Strictly Come Dancing 2013

 

Strictly Come Dancing 2013, Week 1

Night 1 (Friday 27th September 2013)

bruce and tess 1

Bruce and Tess begin the glitz extravaganza.

Tonight no couple will be leaving. Scoring will commence and scores carried over to next week. Lowest votes = dance orf!

Of course, it is the first week and we give some consideration for that, but ultimately, there will be no excuse for a bad performance overall.

The judges are back. Craig Revel-Horwood, Darcey Bussell, Len Goodman and Bruno Tonioli

The fifth judge is also here as they tell us but unlike Strictly it aint the public it’s us.

Len was congratulated for being recently married. Congratulations

Ashley and Ola

Cha Cha

What Makes You Beautiful – One Direction

ashley ola 1

First out was vanilla hunk Ashley Taylor-Dawson. Self-confessed fan of the lycra, Dawson added he may be out of his depth.

The action started with a sassy shake, with spin style from Dawson. Staring at Ola’s derriere jiggling was next. It was tacky. Careless arms. Missed grab of Ola. Funky Chicken moves. Weak steps. No direction. Fair connection with partner. Very bland for first week.

Below are the scores of the judges, along with our professional score in brackets.

LG – Len begins. Leg action bit straighter. Smooth sailing or sink without trace for hopefuls.

BT – Born to be on hands and knees. Timing very good. Work on hips. First out, well done.

CRH – Good amount of rhythm hips implyable and stiff. Also nothing going on there. Footwork feral. Missed a catch. There is a good point. You’re rather easy on the eye, darling.

DB – Very confident first dance. Really impressive. Don’t look to floor (on turns) keep eye level up.

Scores – 5, 6, 7, 7 (6)

Tony and Aliona

Waltz

What I’ll Do –Alison Krauss

tony aliona 1

Could Aliona look like she gives a sh*t?

Jacklin said he liked to wear bright things and stand out. “More sparkle the better” he added. He said Aliona was the “consummate professional.” Must be reading our mind. Not for Aliona though. Thank you, but she ain’t me. Patience and perseverance was needed to succeed, he felt.

Tone of music set. Tender start. Smooth arm flow through. Minor elbow awkwardness after lost in middle to remember steps. Fair recovery. Minimal movement to mask novice beginning though. However a smooth and decent performance from Jacklin.

The talented house singers were introduced with Dave Arch and his fabulous orchestra.

BT – Sentimental, romantic and soft. I didn’t see much of that. Turned into a Galapagos tortoise. You were counting. Do a mistake, follow the flow.

CRH – When you finally got in hold became the Hunchback of Notre Dame. Littered with mistake. Out of time, weren’t leading. Bit of a disaster I say.

DB – It’s terrifying. Nerves out, come back confident, competitive Tony.

LG – Spirit of this show. No dance experience coming out and having a go. Just praying to get through it. Well done.

2, 5, 5, 4 (3)

Mark and Iveta

Tango

Hernando’s Hideaway – Alma Cogan

mark iveta 1

“Come on the big men!” Benton adds as he aims to show big boys can dance akin to Lisa Riley’s shock stint last year on the show.

 Good connection. Eye contact. Leading qualities. Good footwork. Excellent music choice, but needed bit more fluidity. Strong accompaniment. Good matador steps. Good start for week one, strong prominence on stage floor. Naturally will be slow due to obvious speed impediment but needs to have a little faster in parts than just a simple stop moment.

CRH – Should be sharp, intent and purpose, that you had. However, your right thumb, darling, that bothers me. Danced it rather well.

DB – Just brilliantly played. Was little worried. Strong, masculine, in control. It was fab!

LG – Attitude, recognisable steps, frame was okay, am shocked how good that was.

BT – Love how you set up the theme, carry on thieving. So much content in there, drive throughout the foot. Keep proud Latin attitude. Great performance.

5, 6, 7, 6 (6)

Susanna and Kevin

Jive

Shake your tail feather – Blues Brothers

susanna kevin 1

Strong start for lone Susanna. Good strong turnarounds. Good gallops. Decent leg moves. Strong sass. Little dip in speed and steps during three quarters in. Strong fight with Jive bunny Kevin. Held own as strong celeb in pairing. Strong start for first week with one of Strictly most unforgiving dances if gone wrong. Huge credit to newbie Clifton, too.

DB – Really sold me your drive. Good style, try lower heel for more bounce.

LG – One of the hardest dances to do on first week. Satisfying. Fabulous.

BT – Oh yes, read all about it! This girl can shake it! Fantastic stage presence, content great. Be sharper on kicks and flicks.

CRH – Now for the cold hard truth. Extremely laboured, don’t raise shoulder so you don’t have no neck. Would never have attempted that cartwheel, went horrible wrong. Loved armography, energy and personality. Sublime.

Bruce – You’ve done the BBC proud.

6, 7, 8, 7 (7)

Sophie and Brendan

Waltz

Moon River – Audrey Hepburn

 sophie brendan 1

“Pop royalty” Bextor claims chemistry isn’t easy for me.

Too long to get in hold, looking empty. Hard dance, performed well but just felt empty and full of nothingness. No character, personality or style. One arm lift swan flutter and spin from Sophie Ellis Waxtor. Needs to be much stronger. Good paring with Brendan but the Cole effect seems to ruin all dancers with choreography. Did not shine.

LG – Lifted feet off ground quite a bit. Beauty of dance was gorgeous.

BT – Sense the aura of sophistication. Mood absolutely right. Top line gotta really work. I like it.

CRH – Top line is sadly letting you down, would been absolutely beautiful if that didn’t let you down.

DB – It was beautiful, grace, beautiful.

Cut to Blue Peter mother crying in audience.

Serene and graceful. Tess Daly adds in the auditorium. Don’t nick from our dic-tionary. Makes you look well daft. Cram in any word for a “sophistication” is often laughable. Beaming Tess. “HaHa”

7, 7, 7, 7 (6)

Natalie and Artem

Cha Cha

Rasputin – Boney M

natalie artem 1

Blimey that was quick, Artem’s chicken fillets are out!

Smiley Artem guides Gumede a bit initially. Strong leg side shimmy’s from Nat. Slow stand-alone moments. Gaining bearings on live floor. Strong independence from Natalie leading a little. Artem’s smile gained a Colgate shine star cheese moment at end of dance. Oh dear. Looked more like a Paso Doble than a Cha Cha.

BT – With that attitude and lyrical arms of same time, gonna go far. More hip action.

CRH – Multitude of sins of the hip, however, so far, our front runner

DB – Not expecting that much detail in that dance.

LG – Clean, precise, style and rhythm. Craig is right, need more hip action, but fabulous, well done.

Brucie makes a quick input. “Cobblers?” he asks.

“No, Cossacks.” Bruno replies.

 “Yeah Cobblers?”

Most of you didn’t get it, did you? Cobblers. Natalie worked on Corrie, the Cobbles. Artem, being of Russian descent, Cossacks. Hopefully this is clear for  you all. Don’t worry Brucie, I got it, and that’s all you need. J

8, 8, 8, 7, (7)

Night 2 (Saturday 28th September 2013)

Ben and Kristina

Cha Cha

Love Me Again – John Newman

ben kristina 1

Keen smiley Cohen kicked off the evening.  Cheesy smile, non-impactful jump. Awkward footing. Turn and face side motion. Hapless on the floor. Boring, mid-way through looking to Kristina and steps. Stopped mid-dance and let Kristina spin herself. End with twirl around of her. Happy go lucky.

LG – Big Ben. Footwork terrific liked attitude. Get nervous you speed up. Lost your timing.

BT – You are a beefy beast aren’t you? Started very well but got a lot of bulk to move. Gonna be stiff. Loosen up a bit.

CRH – Breezy blocks, laden, out of time.

BF – Any more?

CRH – Oh a host of things, but not enough time.

DB – Upper body very impressive. Use the weight. Move it.

Naturally the gay community of body conscious beef were outraged of Craig’s scoring which was accurate. Adding “our” Ben Cohen. It’s ironic that homophobic Kristina, paired with gay rights campaigner Cohen were together in a no sense pair. From this, the gay community whose voices are not represented by Cohen, who claims to “stand up” and then does practically nothing other than prance around in pants and sell calendars with a buff body claims to be contradiction that the LGBT community wishes to be heard on. One tweet even reminisced, I can’t remember Cohen doing anything other than being in his pants, with similar responses elsewhere.

I’m sure a happy tweet for one moment will suffice for jolly Cohen’s campaign of ‘doing something’ instead.

3, 5, 6, 5 (3)

Fiona and Anton

Tango

A view to a kill – Duran Duran

Strictly Come Dancing

Apparently Anton ‘James Bond’ DuBeke, which constitutes as the same old Anton in a suit, which had zero character of Bond involved was a play along moment.

Strong concentration but decent footing. Looks awkward when trying to maintain facial character. Good dip down hold. Fair end. Decent but needs less thought more feeling to music.

BT – Like the role play. Covered well because you can act. Started very well.

CRH – Lovely to see Anton actually dancing this series. Little rough around the edges at times. Great that he has a partner that can now put one foot in front of the other.

DB – I was impressed with so much content. Composed very well. One thing lets you down is top line.

LG – Content in that was amazing. So much going on. Sharp as a lemon tart. On occasion lost it but character of dance was there.

5, 6, 7, 6 (5)

Dave and Karen

Cha Cha

Moves like Jagger – Maroon 5

Strictly Come Dancing

Loveable baker Myers explained his experience on strictly could be more “like a peacock with constipation.”

Enthusiastic Dave woo’s DJ Karen to the floor and gets some body rollin’ grooves. A while to get in hold and pushing hand motions away then a roll through leg, underneath, of Hauer. Very watered down. Taunt the judges with finger points. Loveable fellow, good party atmosphere but no real charisma, passion or dancing. Left alone to dance on his own and jumped up and down. Is that not technically a lift. These weren’t specified in the rules. Oops.

CRH – Terrifying. I actually recoiled in horror. Overwhelming feeling of revolution. Stop counting.

DB – Strangely in love, I really am.

LG – Bit more stagger than Jagger. Liked your commitment. You’re entertaining.

BT – Most insanely hilarious mess ever. Can’t wait to see what you’re gonna do next.

2, 5, 5, 4 (2)

Rachel and Pasha

Waltz

When I Need You – Luther Vandross

Strictly Come Dancing

Slow and easy start to fold into the Strictly experience. Looks tender but boring. Needs some oomph than playing it safe alone. Trying to drive character across. Good partnership but very slow.

DB – What you need for Waltz is to glide. On change of directions you lose your core. Very beautiful.

LG – You’re pretty and thought dance was. Tad on the careful side. Get you through a three or four weeks, but won’t win. Give it some wellie girl.

BT – Graceful quality. Sounds like an air freshener commercial. All elements are there. Go with the flow. Extend your lines.

CRH – Let your vision flow a bit. Beautiful flow, gorgeous rise and fall and full of elegance.

6, 7, 7, 7 (6)

Julien and Janette

Cha Cha

Vogue – Madonna

julien janette 1

Macdonald opened with a party starter. Setting the mood he began. Good tree arms. Good presence. Enjoying and good hold start. Good leg movement to Jeanette. Voguing it up. Good arms and enthusiasm working the floor. Carry backward of pro decent. Enjoying the shimmy flow. MacDonald shockingly pleases. Tad slow in parts, but for first week was a surprise enjoyment and could potentially get better if worked on more.

LG – Needs more straightness in legs. Fun to watch.

BT – Madonna! (Bruno Vogues) You can’t be mental all the time, trust me I know.

CRH – You certainly did it but not very well. Hideously flat footed.

DB – Better come back with the same joy.

3, 5, 6, 6 (5)

Deborah and Robin

Tango

Money Money Money – ABBA

deborah robin 1

Gent Robin rises Dragon Deborah from Den. In hold twirls decent. Good feet spin round, Keeping up with Robin consistently. Fair kicks from Meaden. Shoves Robin off her chair. More carried than individual but was a good technical beginning.

BT – Very good pitch. You just messed it up in the middle. Beginning good, got into a mess, hanging on to him.

CRH – Lagging behind mostly. Thumb in his armpit and facing the floor, Otherwise surprised,.

DB – Great attack. Pull out of your waist. Very impressed.

LG – Like your attitude. Did mess up a couple of times. Lift your diaphragm a little bit more, but nice, I enjoyed it.

6, 6, 6, 6 (6)

Patrick and Anya

Jive

Runaway Baby – Bruno Mars

Strictly Come Dancing

Another new girl Anya Garnis takes hold of Patrick now. Patrick’s knees may cause a problem overall. Let’s just hope he don’t pop ‘n’ lock it.

Good groove start. Strong kicks low down. Decent arm raises diagonally. Concentration on move. Leather jacket off. Reels Anya along. Strong connection in hold but not coming across strong enough out of hold. Good spirituous style.

CRH – Rhythm and energy absolutely fan-tastic. You just need to sort your flat feet out dar-h-ling. Get on to your balls!

DB – The jive is a very hard dance. You have a great fitness level. On kicks, you get flappy feet. Stretch them.

LG – That jive was alive. What it lacked in technique made up for in enthusiasm, energy and attack.

BT – I love somebody who goes for it. Just work on the refinement in the detail, but great debut.

7, 7, 7, 7 (7)

Vanessa and James

Cha Cha

That don’t impress me much – Shania Twain

Strictly Come Dancing

Throw away flowers. Slow on floor. Walks Vanessa down aisle. Flimsy arms and minor steps. Slow carousel James rips open shirt. Well, if all else fails. Comedy routine in middle rather tepid. I know James has his work cut out for him, but it should have been better than that Vanessa.  Loosen up and seem to feel the music, look less serious but contain a serious idea of dancing to go further. Not everything needs to be comedic to hide inaccuracies.

james jordan shirt rip

DB – Cha Cha is bright and cheeky dance. I did miss this. Ballroom you will love it, especially in the arms of your man James.

LG – Got through it not your natural comfort zone.

BT – Lost the Va-Va-nessa. Body has to express same way as your voice does.

[Brendan’s ignorance vividly on show.]

CRH – Too much acting, not enough dancing.

3, 5, 6, 5 (3)

Tess – “Are we saving the best for last?”

“No”

Abbey and Aljaz

Waltz

Kissing You – Des’ree

Strictly Come Dancing 2013

Pronounced Ally-ash. Ab’s proclaimed she was just like the rest of us “Pickin’ up Pete’s dirty undies.”

In training charming Aljaz was baffled when Abbey compared her dancing to “a sack a spuds!” “Sack of what? What’s spuds?” her partner asked. Bless.

Meet and greet into corner spin around, steps to middle. Floaty effervescence. Extremely soft presentation with elegance in abundance. Telling strong narrative. Powerful transcript. Grace of a true professional here. Interested to see more. Resplendent. Strong partnership.

LG – Dance of the night, Well done.

BT – Dreamy, deeply felt. Romantic, great chemistry. Movement wonderful. Incredible debut on Strictly.

CRH – Had a hunch about you two. Gor-ghus!

BD- Very romantic Waltz. Beautiful lines.

aljaz

Tess – How’s your Strictly experience?

Aljaz – Wonderful up to now, very proud of Abbey, wanna keep going.

8, 8, 8, 8 (8)

Who shone and who stank?

Aljaz and Abbey stole the show. Julien MacDonald’s number is a guilty pleasure you could watch on repeat. Susanna and Mark have both been surprises unexpected for a greater time on Strictly if worked harder at.

Brendan Cole’s failure to take or give direction along with Aliona’s mirrored ignorance is shameful. Strictly can fire the pair of them next series. They are not needed. Ben Cohen’s sympathy vote and dire dance was not appealing, even if he dances in his pants. Ashley and Ola did not strike a strong cord, which questions, are the hot hunks of 2013 a waste of colossal Strictly time?

grotty snotty brendan

Overall SCD’s beginning shows the mild characters of lower par may be the ones to really shine and rebuff the so called glamour hunks and hunkesses. The lower pecking order are the ones to watch for in this 2013 series of sequins, shimmy’s and spats.

Well, this evening cross a lot of daubs of our 2013 Strictly Bingo Card. We’ll have them uploaded for you later this week. Come back next week for more sequin frolics and mayhem and take our poll below on who you thought fabulous this weekend!

You can follow us on Twitter! (click below)

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Dear Deandre #6

Dear Deandre…

Some stories come from The Sun newspaper headlines as well as our own readers problems. Dear Deandre is not associated with The Sun and all opinions are our own advice.

You can contact us by email (on the contact page above) or on Twitter. @FalseFabs. Alternatively you can post a comment on the site below. Reader discretion is assured.

We’re not sending you a leaflet and I don’t have extortionate phone lines to become rich on your sexual dilemmas.  Dear Deandre has moved to a bi-weekly affair, in order to give you time to read, solve and submit problems if you need any advice on sex, relationships or general problems. Thank You.

I cheated on my girlfriend, with her mum

“I always thought guys who cheat are stupid and deserve to get dumped but I have done it to my wonderful girlfriend – and with her mum. I’m terrified of losing her. I’m 26, she’s 25. We’ve been together two years and we love each other deeply. She recently went away with work. It’s an important project and she was nervous, so her mum came with us to take her to the airport. I drove her mum back home and she asked to me join her at a neighbour’s party. I said no but she insisted. I woke up to find her in bed with me wearing nothing but a silky nightie. Now I have feelings for her.”

silky

Though your girlfriend’s mother has made the running and seduced you it doesn’t change the fact, as a grown man, you helped yourself to forbidden fruit. You may never have thought you would cheat but you have, and done so with such proximity that this is implosive. You say you feel for her mother, but this is simply feelings of initial lust before the ‘honeymoon period’ wears  off. Honestly ask yourself, can you see yourself in a relationship with her mother nearly twice your age? It won’t last long. Confess to your girlfriend and hope she can forgive you. If you truly love her then you may accept the consequences and can prove you still love her after. If you do not, you should end the relationship. The longer your deceit from both continues, the more you will lose everything as truth always comes out.

I’m having great sex with gym instructor behind girls back

“Sex with my girlfriend is non-existent but good sex equals love for me. I’ve been having great sex with another woman and I’ve fallen in love with her. I’m 32, my girlfriend’s 29. The sex has never been amazing. I met an instructor at the gym. She helped me to improve my fitness levels. There was always an amazing chemistry between us.”

woman weight

Your frustration with a sex less relationship has driven you into the arms of the first temptation you found available. Have you told your instructor you are in a relationship? I feel you haven’t. Regardless, you should consider what you want and take action. Do you want a fancy fling that is going nowhere or a sex less relationship? There are ways to change this. Either one, talk to your girlfriend about the lack of sex and work it out. Or two, dump both of them and find another girl, start afresh and have a relationship with a sustainable level of sex involved. You can’t have both in different avenues.

Changing room led to steamy shower tease

“I went to the gym a few days ago and sat down as I was changing from an exhausting work out. There was a guy opposite me with only a towel on and bent over dropping it, level with my eye-line. I looked away for most of this but caught a glimpse. I went to the shower and he soon came in when it was just us. He was opposite me. He was like one of those shower ladies from I’m a Celebrity. Great body, abs, the lot. He turned, faced me and titled his head back while the water trickled down his body and manhood. I’m sure he was teasing me. When he finished he left without looking and cocked a smile. I’m a guy of 26. He looks about 24 – 27.”

sean lowe bachelor

It is possible that the guy was teasing you. He could have been interested in a quickie or he may simply enjoy being a voyeur around other guys enjoying them looking for a bit of fun. If this is the case then either look or don’t but enjoy the view or not and leave them be. They have technically done nothing wrong or harmful. If he approaches you then you will have options, but unless he does, it seems he may want you to look but not touch. Take it for what it’s worth. If this gives you lustful feelings for him, it’s your choice to ask or not, but this could be harmful if you fall out and continue to go to the same gym afterwards. I advise you just let this pass and allow him to continue showing off if this is what he likes, he may soon get bored if you’re not interested.

Threesome led to male desire over my girlfriend

!I had a threesome with my girlfriend and an old school mate and now I think I may be gay. I’m 31 and my girlfriend is 35. We both work for a large company. We invited an old school pal over for a three way. He was up for it. It was amazing sex. But when we were both penetrating my girl, I was drawn to his eyes. He had a smooth and great body. We also rubbed together as we had sex with my girlfriend. He looked back at me and smiled. I’ve started thinking about what it would be like if we were together romantically. Am I gay? It was my girlfriend’s idea to have this threesome.  I thought I would be comfortable with someone I knew, as it would be just sex and he wouldn’t steal my girl from me.  He’s 31, too.”

3way

Most men’s fear is that a threesome with a man will turn them gay like this instance. This instance is a rare and often mild one, but it has happened. You may be a bisexual enjoying men more than females, or you could indeed be gay. There is no shame in being either way and you can still enjoy comfortable and healthy sex lives. Test the water with your friend and see if he enjoyed time with you more than her. Perhaps he felt the same way. More often than not he may not have, but he may be open to communication with you. You might also be able to confide him and you may not even really fancy him, but because a man was involved whom you felt comfortable with has made you understand you want certain things and you perhaps do not feel you see sexuality but relationships with partners regardless of gender.

Game of poker lead to sexy strip fun

“Me and my best friend play poker often and we invited some girls we know over for a friendly game. The four of use ended up played a game of strip poker. The girls were into it, laughing and eager to lose some clothes. After it got late to around 2 o’clock, they called a cab and left. It was a good night but we were down to both our boxers.  After they left, they had left us in a fun mood and my mate dared us to finish the game with a last round. The loser would have to help give the other a hand, as it were. I ended up losing and played him on the sofa. He became throbbing hard and I could tell he enjoyed it. He lowered my head and asked if I would orally please him instead and I did. I am 100% straight but this felt like an amazing experience and I want to play the game again with him as a regular thing but just with us on weekly occasions. Should I pursue this? I’m 26 and he’s 25.”

strip poker

The thrill of the game, loyalty to the dare and then pleasure from the sex acts has caused you to unlock a hidden level of your sexuality. You may be straight and you want to experience different levels of sexual pleasure and fun that society often condemns us for. There is nothing wrong if you enjoy sex responsibly and healthily. As to whether you should ask him, well, it seems he enjoyed this and may have felt the same buzz you have. You can ask him, and he will probably agree but be careful if he decides this is not a possibility he wants to pursue and respect him for that. If you have sex, consider using a condom for a healthier approach.

PC fixer buzzed my harddrive

“I cheated on my boyfriend with the computer repair man. I feel I should tell him the truth about what I’ve done but it would destroy him. I am 29 and have been feeling sexually frustrated with my boyfriend. He is 30. We have sex but it is uneventful and boring. I needed a buzz. The PC repair man came over and after he connected me I lapped him up. I found myself doing what I normally wouldn’t and placed my hand over his crotch. I could tell he liked it. We had sex there and then on the floor and then moved over onto the sofa. I felt fantastic, thrilling and surprised by the no strings, spontaneity which drove me wild. I really regret it though, as I love my boyfriend. How can I make sure he knows I love him if I tell him?”

pc man

The spontaneous level of fun can be an exhilarating experience. However, as you understand, you are not single and this has its problems attached. If you tell your boyfriend then you should explain why you felt you needed this buzz and hope to work your differences out. Perhaps suggesting different techniques, positions and mood of how to engage in sex will help. Communicate on how to achieve a healthier sex life and enjoy each other’s company. Tell each other what you like to do and this can ease tensions with one another.

Girl’s mother asked for permission to give me oral sex. She agreed

“My girlfriend’s mother asked for permission to give me oral sex. I’m 28, my girl is 25. Her mum is 47. My girlfriend told me she had asked. Shockingly my girlfriend thought it would be funny and said yes. Her mum came in as I was on the sofa watching TV. My girl left. I said I wasn’t sure but she pulled my jeans off quick and started. I didn’t have time to stop her. After a few minutes being erect my girl came in and sat next to us watching. She put on some mother porn from an old video. I was in two minds. A hot scenario and an awkward one. After, I felt ashamed to have let it happen. They want to do it again while my girl watches. Once may have been enough. I feel uncomfortable but I do enjoy it too.”

girlfriend

This does sound complicated but it is whether you yourself are comfortable overall. It seems your problem is that your girlfriend enjoys watching with such a level of closeness to you and the other and family connections can become awkward should situations escalate with upset, jealousy etc. Maybe you can outline some ground rules and ask not to make it a continual thing and only now and then if she has no partner and is really starved for companionship. If it happens every week, and you are uncomfortable then you should say as this fantasy can quickly become problematic and you may lose your girlfriend. Try focusing on sex with your girlfriend only and explain to her privately that it may be ok now and then, but overall is awkward for you because her springing it on you randomly threw you off course.

Cheating girlfriend forces me to find others

Jealousy

“I think my girlfriend is cheating on me. I feel so low and lonely that I am not looking for other partners. I am 33. She’s 29. Our sex life has hit a slump. I’m working all hours and come home exhausted and earn our money and she seeks outside relationships. I don’t know how to confront it and have no resorted to looking for other sex partners instead.”

Your girlfriend’s infidelity is inexcusable but the pair of you have reached a level of stalemate. You should either part ways or communicate. If it is this bad, consider having an open relationship. You might want to try role playing if you don’t want role playing. Try to incorporate ideas to making the relationship work if you can and are committed to a resolution. The partners you have sex with are also uneventful for both of you as they are a substitute for the lack of communication.

Swinging standards on third strike sex

“My wife and I are regular swingers. We love the fun and thrill. I like sitting and watching as a young stud has sex with her on our couch as I watch naked on the floor. The smiles on her face also make me pleased. It feels amazing to see a guy underneath enjoying it too and we all have a happy time without it sounding dirty. We always all get on and enjoy it. It’s a good communal experience. One guy now wants to be a regular and we have our own rules not to let guys have sex with us more than three times at the most. How can we tell him we would like to be friends but we’re not a merry go round? She’s 39, I’m 46. He is 27.”

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You will have to be firm but fair. You can outline to him that you have your own set rules. If you do allow him to participate for two more sessions then he may understand to make the best of the experiences and you can give him clarity that the show is ending, so to speak. He will appreciate the experiences more and you can too while setting your boundaries. You may want to make them special somehow. You can still be friends and take to parties if that’s your thing, or if you have other friends you can pair them and share newer experiences. If he becomes too clingy you will have to explain your rules constructively and that he needs to respect them.

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Album Review: Disclosure, Settle

Settle (2013)

Disclosure

disclosure 2

The hottest new, indie club duo providing a new wave of euphoric beats made a huge impact in their initial ‘being found ‘episodes a few months ago, most noted by us initially before mainstream media joined the bandwagon. Since the music duo Disclosure have risen and now attempt to place a massive footprint in the market with their debut album, Settle.

The sound is fresh, smooth and subtle adding a breezy club euphoria. However with all great albums there is at least one song that needs tweaking or is in the repertoire that isn’t as amazing, but is often forgiven if the rest of the tracks make up for this.

disclosure 1

Up to and including track 5 (When a fire starts to burn, Latch, F for you, White Noise feat. AlunaGeorge, Defeated no more feat. Ed Macfarlane) starts well, but begins to peak into the sixth as wayward and loses focal and aural concentration. Ironically “Stimulation” does not have the required effect and becomes too heavily clunky with boredom seeping through. However the tone of sound changes more positively three songs on going into “Grab Her!” starting to rebuild a more funky, indie reintegration. The end of the album is somewhat of a mild letdown as it tends to just end without a strong signoff.

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Nominated for the prestigious Mercury Prize in September 2013.

The album is a classic Ibiza chillout comedown essential, or one for a Sunday morning hangover relaxer. The eclectic comedown has certainly put Disclosure on the musical map as one of its greatest producers for the modern generation with club and indie beats working succinctly together for listening pleasure. The pair, with their debut stamp of approval, may have a longer main stay in the industry if it can produce continual capable sounds that bind revellers together with thrilling joy. The boys have certainly ticked a number of positive boxes that can endorse them further on which will no doubt have musical forces join with than against them to light sounds for those listening in with glowing approval.

Best Tracks?  F for You, Latch, White Noise. Confess to me feat Jessie Ware.

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Entertainment Wise

Can Wonder Woman resurface on screen?

In the growing age of a male dominated Superhero franchise and Societies impact on females as secondary, many have called for a female superhero to re-embody the limelight. There aren’t many female hero’s to note with the obvious being Wonder Woman and there are calls for her to stage a comeback. But in this revolutionary age, filled with actresses who are somewhat fashionable icons rather than gritty heroes, surely we cannot blame numerous Hollywood executives for rehashing the male impactful lycra saviours?

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If Wonder Woman were to resurface who would play her? Would she have stage prominence? Would it empower women as it did in the 60s/70s and 80s?

With the lack of female role models in sport, politics and business clearly there is a place for such a comeback. However, Wonder Woman, in my opinion, should not be reborn just for the sake to sell a movie. The cost would be ruining the character for generations, missing vital ingredients for sequels and silly beauty models trying to bag roles that destroy her lineage. You could hire me to be part oft he team also, should the go ahead occur. 🙂

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She fights for justice, love and sexual equality. Her special weapon, the Lasso of Truth binds her foes with peaceful might. On a mission to be noble, Wonder Woman may just be the greatest female to resurface as a role model. However, the script, action and actress portrayal must be paramount to success. It should not be resurfaced for a fun time if it will end up becoming a flop.

Asked what Superhero I most resemble, the answer is Superman. Helps others, seeks truth and fights injustice. Forget Batman, maybe Wonder Woman should have joined Superman in the Man of Steel sequel as the female mirror image. Am I transformed into Wonder Woman instead? 😮

Most notably nearly all females aside from Wonder Woman have been spin off’s such as SuperGirl, BatGirl etc and others in a series like Storm, Rogue and Jean Grey from X-Men. No stand alone character has joined the screens. The recent uprising of KissAss’s HitGirl is not one to fully embody because she is a villain in a heroes role with such violence and unnecessary evil promoted for the idea of goodwill which upsets the boundary.

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Simply put, the only female hero is Wonder Woman, which also shows just how lacking the era of female power as a hero has come. For at least four decades, there has been none of real interest.

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The majority of leading females have been cast into the role of wronged woman fighting for revenge using such brutal force to achieve retribution. Examples such as Kill Bill, Hit Girl as above, among other comic heroines is apparent. There should not be a female hero just for the sake of producing one. Then the production is to develop a fighting woman and then producers can’t help themselves to then cast them into a bitter battling demon of righteous value, supposedly. That formula does not work.

SHORTLIST

Lucy Lawless

  • Xena, primarily, but could be looked on for fallback as her stint in Battlestar Gallactica proved she can add a different layer to a charcter.

Gina Carano

  • Has more of a model look, however, which would disregard what Wonder Woman stands for.

Megan Fox

  • A huge no, no. Has no appeal except in a bikini.

Jessica Chastain

Christina Hendricks

  • No athleticisim, looker only.

Lynn Collins

  • Already played in John Carter film. 2012.

Emily Blunt

Michelle Williams

Meryl Streep

  • Well, she can do anything, can’t she?

Rachel McAdams

Christina Ricci

Mila Jovavich

Thandie Newton

What Wonder Woman requires is strong sense of appeal, maturity and a strong role model in heroic aspect. The Woman can be a redhead, too, as this would work in a modern take. Though she could never be blonde. The five below are options that would be best suited to bring back a strong sense of style, a sexual pin up in a respectful approach and aspirations for the future with a different stance and style in each one individual.

OUR TOP 5?

(In no order)

Christina Ricci

Thandie Newton

Lynn Collins

Jessica Chastain

Emily Blunt

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Retrogeek 

Mercury Music Prize Nominees announced

The candidates are in for the Mercury Music Prize. One of the most established prizes for budding new stars to launch a platform to the bloodsucking mainstream dilution has been revealed since Wednesday.

The prize represents artists of strong, unique value embodied with tight talent and pleasing musical sounds for audiences away from the average type of bubblegum pop today.

The shortlist of the twelve artists and albums in the running are below, and make for essential acquisition of many, if not all albums on offer.

This year’s prize is a tight contest. Our winner? It is an extreme task to select from such a diverse and outstanding batch of artistry on offer but, we’re backing Jon Hopkins or James Blake, with Blake as front runner. Their work has been immensely succinct and filled with style, sound and impact that carries listeners along to a wide range of achievable reality and fiction.

Arctic Monkeys and David Bowie are the favourites to win the prize, but criticism range from too predictable, aged and too mainstream to receive the prize as nothing achievable could be done with such rights. To be nominated is huge endorsement alone for artists’ respect of outstanding music contributions often ignored by big company music bosses unturned to the real public purchasers of sound. The prize has often handed a surprise victor numerous times. The award will be chosen next month.

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NOMINATED ALBUMS

 

Arctic Monkeys, AM

Davie Bowie, The Next Day

Disclosure, Settle

Foals, Holy Fire

Jake Bugg, Jake Bugg

James Blake, Overgrown

Jon Hopkins, Immunity

Laura Marling, Once I was an Eagle

Laura Mvula, Sing to the Moon

Rudimental, Home

Savages, Silence Yourself

Villagers, Awayland

 

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Mercury Prize

Rylan Clark dabbles with BB housemate Dan Neal

Homewrecker Rylan Clark, 24, whose real name is Ross Clark, has finally been revealed as having a relationship with ex Big Brother housemate and former police detective Dan Neal. Clark, who made no secrets publically letching over Dan when the former detective was inside the house as a housemate had been secretly romancing the star through emails, texts and online social networks.

Bit on the side…  Lovers Neal and Clark share a kiss on a night out

Neal, who was in a stable relationship with then boyfriend Matt Parker was discovered exchanging secret messages with Clark after Parker had access to Neal’s Twitter account since maintaining it during his partner’s stay inside the Big Brother compound.  Parker released the details and screengrabs of the multiple messages between the two romancers below.

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Promiscuous Clark, who presented the Big Brother sister show, Bit on The Side, was deemed unprofessional for chasing and sleeping with a contestant on the show. Show producers and Channel 5 tried to keep the details a secret with a cover up and took no action on Clark’s abuse of presenting and housemate idolization.

The pair were recently seen kissing at Manchester Pride by appalled community members.

Former police detective Neal, 33, who worked on the Jimmy Savile sex abuse case with numerous details on victims from Operation Yewtree, which Channel 5 had hoped he may spill secrets of, asked infatuated Clark “Will u get a blocking at work? X” to which his secret squeeze responded “i dunno? i really dunno depends if press get hold of it, which they probs will, but i dunno lol xx”

Clark, who had received numerous criticisms as a host lacking charisma, presentation skills and dignity hit back at fans recently stating people “haven’t even got a tooth in their head” for failing to address his lackluster presentation and issues with his glaring white teeth.

Fans of the show labelled Dan as a “fame hungry whore” as his ex Parker also confirmed writing “so fame hungry you will do anything!! #downgrade.”

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Parker, in hospital gown.

Former axed show presenter and journalist Jaime East tweeted “Rule No. 1 – Don’t f**k the housemates.”

Neal justified his response to the drama, of which Clark dismissed rumours as false at the time, adding “U can’t plan some things in life. Some things just happen. I didn’t see this coming, but some1 is making me v happy! #outoftheblue #together”. The pair split in late August.

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The shows theme was called “Secrets and Lies” to which Clark continually promoted verbally.

Channel 5’s biography from its website of Dan from his own words state “Daniel says his best trait is his loyalty and the fact that he is always there for his friends.”

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Shameful Neal had also secretly campaigned for a hosting role on the next series of Bit on The Side.

Many in the LGBT gay community are appalled and disgusted with the pair’s behaviour. Many feel the homosexual community will now be seen as bad in reputation stemming from Neal and Clark’s adulterous antics which are said not to represent all gay men. But nevertheless they will be looked down upon due to Clark’s ignorant, lustrous desire without any thoughts of splitting relationships apart for sex and fame.

Channel 5 were unavailable for comment. They have not issued any statement or reprimands of Clark’s behaviour.

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Twitter / Matt Parker

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