Strictly Come Dancing 2013, Week 8 Results

Strictly Come Dancing 2013, Week 8 Results: Blackpool

tess claudia 8

Tonight’s glitzy results come live from the Blackpool Tower. The first couple making it through is – Susanna and Kevin. Also joining the show next week is – Abbey and Aljaz, Ashley and Ola. The first to grace the danceoff is – Mark and Iveta.

Andre Rieu

Music of the night

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Added with a tender routine with Anton and Iveta, Andreu Rieu gave yet another stunning performance without one note improper with his own orchestra. Flawless once again.

Len’s Lens

More round up came from the protruding lens. Nothing of interest was seen.

 

The rest of the results are revealed now by Tess. Making it through in the second batch of results is – Patrick and Anya, Sophie and Brendan and Natalie and Artem. The couple joining the bottom two for the danceoff is Fiona and Anton leaving Ben and Kristina homefree to next week.

 

JLS

Billion Lights

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The fourpiece boyband gave an extremely shouty and awkward song added with Marvin’s awful miming on offer. It was off key, had weird staging and was trying so desperately to have an electric sound which should not have been attempted. The R’n’B pop band should not do something they can’t handle. They are then overexposed as now. It didn’t work. Oh. And that Marvin is presenting Series three of The Voice UK soon. Now it become all so clear why they were there.

The dance off

Mark and Iveta dance off against Fiona and Anton. Both performances were once again the same as their performance earlier, however both looked more at ease this time round.

The vote has put both couples on equal par. It’s a tough call as to who should go. Fun with Mark or give Fiona another chance.  All in all, we would choose Fiona, ultimately to stay but its tight. To improve she needs to really go for it without too much seriousness in step approval.

The Judges Vote

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The judges now vote. In the event of a tie head judge Len, as always, will have the casting vote.

Craig – Couple I would like to save, Fiona and Anton.

Darcey – Like to save is Mark and Iveta.

Bruno – Couple like to save is Mark and Iveta.

Len – (Now has the deciding vote) – Very close thing. Gave them both 8’s. Danceoff you up your game or nerves. For that reason I’m going to save Mark and Iveta.

Bond Girl and Author Fiona Fullerton flutters away from the show. Fiona said of her parting ways the show was “like being a guest at the best party in the world.” She tanked Anton for being “unbeleivably patient.”

Anton gave praise to his golden-eye. “This show is made fun by the people we get to dance with. Lovely.”

Fullerton left with a grateful and cheerful end to the Strictly experience.

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Strictly Come Dancing, Week 8: Blackpool

Strictly Come Dancing, Week 8, Blackpool

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This week is the extravaganza build up that is Blackpool. Last year was Wembley, this year it’s back ‘upt north.’

Opening the floor with a loud pink and blue sass fest were the professionals and some young ballroom dancers to lift the mood of Strictly fun fest for its eighth week. With so much on the line who will raise their game and be booted off the tower? Get ready to catch the donkey ride home.

The BBC decided to spend much more of the taxpayers money on the celebrities being wheeled in on a platform and Sophie Ellis Bextor (among the other females) in a putrid green peacock costume. Was it really worth that much?

Out stroll our glam hosts Sir Bruce Forsyth and Tess Daly to get the ball(room) rolling.

First up this week is…

Sophie and Brendan

Quickstep

The Lady Is A Tramp – Shirley Bassey

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The first thing we see is Sophie’s mum (again) wheeled out by the BBC for some tips on how to dance. Thanks for that unimportant tidbit.

Sophe begins stepping down the table to join Brendan in hold. Good start on the floor, carried by Brendan somewhat still. Little off time in middle of song. Stops slow for a moment in routine costing time. Runs around out of hold from Brendan only into arms of three human male props. Having multiple dancers to hide flaws is no level of success.

The judges Craig Revel Horwood, Darcey Bussel, Len Goodman and Bruno Tonioli give their comments and scores, along with our professional mark in brackets.

Len – Full of intent. Hair wafting out. absolutely spot on.

Bruno – This lady definitely is not a tramp. You’re a tease. Full of character. Really, really nice. Check the top line.

Craig – I really loved the story. However, your top line thought you lost. Bit loose, jaggered. Storytelling absolutely phenomenal.

Darcey – You came alive. It was so beautiful.

7, 9, 9, 9 (6)

Brucie explains about the Shakespearian tragedy MacBeth. Funny, we send a Macbethian tweet of dialogue out two weeks ago. BBC are so clever aren’t they? As well as contradictory with their systematic levels of abuse. Anything spring to mind now then, now then?

Patrick and Anya

Samba

Copa Cabana – Barry Manilow

patrick anya 8

Helped by two feather babes. Joins Anya quickly into strong hold. Shame of awkward malfunction slightly in hold from Garnis clothing with Patrick. Recovers quickly from Patrick. Leading well with Anya into spin around arm groove. Good rhythm. Strong presence on own as well as with Anya. Great show but a tad awks.

Dave Arch and his fabulous Orchestra were introduced for providing the excellent evening’s live sound.

Bruno – A blistering hot Samba. Captured the flavour so well. Variety of steps. Rhythm. Close to perfection except mess up and tiny incident. Stop me to give it the perfect score. One of the best male Samba dancers we ever had.

Craig – Think you are one of the best, just unfortunate it went horribly wrong. That could have been dazz-a-ling, darling.

Darcey – Extraordinary difficult dance. No gimmicks. Tiny, tiny fault. It was superb, well done.

Len – That’s not a Samba, it’s a Wamba! You just messed up one step. It was fantastic. You are a terrific dancer. Believe me.

8, 9, 9, 9 (8)

Tess – Go Coconuts!

It’s Big Ben time, Brucie informs. Smiley Ben is shown. Should he dance with his shirt off? Any ladies here? Bruce continues to pander the audience who predicatble reply with a slut fest with tongues hanging out letching. How sad of a common denominator are you?

Ben and Kristina

American Smooth

Fallin’ – Alicia Keys

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Ben’s preparation involved a game of Buckeroo and Twister. Saddle up, then.

Kristina was thrown forward by three males as Ben dances on spot to side movement only. One move Ben catches Kristina after the three other dancers lift her onto him. Ben carried by Kristina into arm flip around. Rihanoff runs into lift as Ben only stands and hoists up. Weak, lackluster and empty. As well as cheating with dancers there was no skill on offer here though Ben did however tick a couple of feet boxes in right place.

Craig – Big Ben is back. Very quick Viennese. Would’ve licked bit more out of hold. Vast improvement.

Darcey- Air and flow. What a tentative partner you are. Think about what your gonna do. Brilliant.

Len – Honestly, last week, I thought your Jive was fabulous.  When you’re out of hold gets bit too wimpy.

Bruno – Aw, Ben. Had such warmth. Most difficult part was a Viennese Waltz, which you did very well. Well done.

Of course, this week was the sympathy vote in the national press after Ben did the rounds stating he would dedicate this week to his late father and to ‘get the gays’ talking about wearing only his pants. Again. We don’t do any bull here. We are not here to tell biased accounts on sympathy. Everyone has a hard life. Cut the crap. Be a professional. If you impress on skill and merit, you will get the credit. But most media apart from us is too scared to be honest and professional, isn’t it?

8, 8,8, 8 (3)

Ashley and Ola

Paso Doble

You Give Love A Bad Name – Bon Jovi

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Slow in hold standing there only behind Ola. Focus on Ola skirt wafting only. No prominence. Slow legs crossover looking empty. Stamp of feet up on floor a lift. Naughty naughty. Another foot lift afterwards. Empty and nothing eventful whatsoever. Cowboy with open shirt will secure votes. Contemporary calamity with Paso Bore-ble.

Darcey – Had strong lines. Just would have loved a little bit more drama.

Len – I thought you got stronger and stronger. Speed and the stillness. Whip it and wait.

Bruno – Lone ranger is back with a vengeance. Plenty of thrust. Never lost the focus. I disagree with them. Thought you were on it. Could not take my eyes off you.

Craig – Cowboy defending himself with a cape doesn’t really do it for me. Idea bit bizarre, am into bizarre and extraordinary, and that was extraordinary.

8, 9, 9, 9, (4)

Looks like Len has forgotten the cheeky lifts observation from two weeks ago. Say something nice on Blackpool week, aye?

Fiona and Anton

American Smooth

Come Fly With Me – Frank Sinatra

fiona anton 8

After charismatic Anton stops shmoozing other female dancers, lifts Fiona into soft glide lift decently. Arms bit wayward. Kicks good. Clean lift flying skirt around by steps. Good partner work. Held own in end lift too, despite minor awkwardness. Fair, hard effort and elegant.

Len – Lifts, little bit economy. Had an air of style and class about it.

Bruno – VIP lounge! Elegant, very proper, dainty. When you change direction, you go ‘Ooh where’s my handbag?’ Anton is there. I thought you looked really good.

Craig – Liked to have seen bit smoother throughout. Last pivots, getting into last lift utter disaster as we all managed to witness. First class element – the soft shoe in the middle. Gorgeous.

Darcey – Lovely little details. Create nice lines. Only a couple of those things. Looks a little bit unfinished.

6, 7, 8, 8 (6)

Abbey and Aljaz

Quickstep

Walking On Sunshine – Katrina and the Waves

abbey aljaz 8

In hold feet sweet. Good turns and in hold head pivots with arms. Kept up with run along trot strongly. Good hops on spot let down a tad with leg extension bit low. Recovered with strong symmetry legs bicycle kicking with Aljaz. Ends well on deck chairs.

Bruno – Champagne for Abbey! Unbelievable

Craig – Lot of gaping throughout. Frame loose throughout. Let it go completely. In Charleston sections dancing with both arms. These are minor details, I absolutely loved it.

Darcey – It was beautiful. You travelled with control.

Len – If you were a stick of Blackpool rock, you’d have talent in the middle. Speed, clarity of movement. That was good.

7, 10, 10, 10 (8)

This, of course is the week, in which Strictly votes its performers up to keep them in the contest for its preferred final from executives behind the scenes. Which, also costs them public votes in response. People are not that thick. It will also hurt Abbey as a dancer when further along.

Mark and Iveta

Jive

You Can’t Stop the Beat  – Hairspray

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Fast bouncy number gets mood going. Mark in hold with Iveta well for start. Hands and character keeping stead well. Fun shimmy’s along with style. Bit stalling though. Gets crowd clapping along well. Good walk around with Iveta. Spins of Iveta toward Mark good but not fully done by Benton.

Craig – little bit flat footed and stompy. Looked like you had flippers on end of your legs. Really looking for bit more technique. Loved Hairspray sector. Brilliant.

Darcey – Show stopping performance. Tried really hard. So much content.

Len – It was fun. Joy in performance. Big. Brash. Noisy and fabulous to watch.

Bruno – What you gave us is a fantastic ride. Feel good factor through the roof. Kicks and flicks could’ve been sharper.

5, 8, 8, 8 (7)

Susanna and Kevin

Paso Doble

Los Toreadors – From musical Carmen

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Foot stomping of matador Kevin slowly guides bullish Susanna to the floor into hold as the action begins. Strong start with spins and character. Bit timid in middle side to side with Kevin. Wafts skirt bit too much. Ends strong on arm swift interlocks before covered by huge red cape. Very strong skill but lacking a tough fire to get top marks.

Darcey – I loved it. You ate up the dance floor. The drama, the dynamics.

Len – Full of tasty morsels all the way through.

Bruno – Isssss Car-men! It was just… FAN-TAS-TIC!

Craig – Absolutely Fab-u-lous!

9, 10, 10, 10 (8)

BBC anchor Susanna said “I’m not a ten person.” You are in Blackpool, dear.

Natalie and Artem

Charleston

Bang Bang – will.i.am

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Natalie’s blackouts were explained after last week’s dramatic turn of events saw Natalie gain a bye for the week.

Gaining secret access, Artem struts up to podium sweetie Natalie. Working the funky footwork on the floor together with strong kick around head legs of Artem from Nat. Into hold well, but little stalling. Clearly week has affected confidence a little. Roll through from over shoulder of Artem very clean and tidy with consistent end.

Len – Spectacular.

Bruno – Your party could go on forever.

Craig – Loved modern twist. sen-sa-tion-al.

Darcey – Always beautiful details. Added something new, character and personality. Joy to watch.

9, 10, 10, 10

Ever predictable considering the over-marking but if this is the theme for a Blackpool/Wembley arena show, then what is the point? Keep it simple or just don’t bother as it dips into how your seen by others as a good show or not.

 

Danger zone

Who could face the bottom of the pack this week?

Fiona, Mark and Patrick

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Strictly Come Dancing 2013, Results, Week 6

SCD Week 6 Results

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The ever glam Tess Daly and Claudia Winkleman present the results to reveal which dance couples will leave the show this week.

Revealed in “no particular order” the first couple safe is Patrick and Anya. Joining them to next week is Sophie and Brendan, Fiona and Anton, Ben and Kristina.

The first couple to fall into the dreaded dance off is Abbey and Aljaz.

Madness

La Luna

Madness

The dark and stylish Camden crew were called upon to give a spooky indie themed performance. As usual, it was a classic show from Suggs and the band to add to the professional dancers’ wacky Beetlejuice monochrome dwindling tunnel.

Len’s Lens

It’s time once more to peer down the all-seeing lens of Len, capturing all the unseen, juicy extras. Craig made it up the stairs this week with a sparkly crutch. Instantly shown was Ben Cohen’s naked chest body with the crowd screaming like a slut fest orgy.

Len commented on the lift abuses in Sophie and Brendan’s routine. Womaniser Brendan was shown trying to pounce on Darcey with his claw as she recoiled in horror telling him he had no chance.  Darcey and Bruno were shown with their congratulations of awarding the first ten to Natalie and Artem. (As did False Fabs.) Craig added she “wobbled” a bit which knocked her getting a ten. We agree with Craig, certain critique must be adhered to, but in this case her effortless rendition was deserving compared to the rest of the failing pack. Rachel was under the microscope with Craig who felt she earned her seven.

The results are back now as we find out who else has made it through to next week. Going through is Susanna and Kevin, Mark and Iveta, Natalie and Artem and Ashley and Ola.

The final couple facing the dance off is Rachel and Pasha leaving Dave and Karen to stride through to the lucky week number seven.

The dance off

Abbey and Aljaz

Rumba

Stay – Shakespeare’s Sister

It was clearly another near fautless performance from Abbey. The majority of the steps were touched and in a structured level as the previous evening.

Rachel and Pasha

American Smooth

I Put a Spell on You by Screamin’ – Jay Hawkins

Rachel gave a similar and good performance, with improvement from the evening, but cannot rely on this to carry her through on the final crucial vote off.

Judges Vote

abbey aljaz 6 results

Craig – I would like to save Abbey and Aljaz.

Darcey – Both couples performed even better tonight. Couple I have to save is Abbey and Aljaz.

Bruno – Very difficult. I would like for Abbey and Aljaz to stay.

Len – Agreed. I would have saved Abbey and Aljaz.

rachel pasha 6 results

Times Up!

Talking of her time Rachel said “I haven’t cried until now. Really enjoyed tonight. Abbey’s just gorgeous. No shame in going out to her.” She also thanks Strictly for her experience. Pasha said “it was amazing to work with you. It’s been an absolute pleasure Riley responded to dance pro Pasha. Riley clocks off from the competition with praise from her fellow Strictly ‘family’ friends.

Reflection

On reflection we gave Abbey a 7 and Rachel a 6 which means that the pair of them were fairly equal performances on the night. But none of them were overly fascination or capturing audience imagination which has cost them votes in light of elderly grannies voting for Fiona, Gays and Women shameless voting for Ben, the comedy act Dave garnering fun votes ‘for a laugh’ and Sophie gaining the housewives sympathy votes of their ‘fantasy daughter.’ These are the problems that cost Strictly its reputation in terms of audience because it paves the way for such stupidity, most recent with Dave and Cohen. It’s time for the audience to start voting carefully on the dances and the competition instead of an ‘XFactor’ favouritism that Strictly is meant to avoid for fans.

Strictly Bingo!

Into Week 6 and our Bingo card is shaping up nicely. Come on Strictly, we need them all! Get a move on. Ben will be gone soon, so give us the shirt.

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Strictly Come Dancing, Week 6

SCD 2013, Week 6, Halloween

Strictly Come Dancing

Week six of the Strictly sequined extravaganza begins. This week we descend into the deadly ‘Horrorwood’ where the ghoulish and the gor-g-hous find their rhythm. This is week six and the stakes are higher than ever. No time for complacency, the contest is starting to seriously begin.

The glitzy hosts Sir Bruce Forsyth and Tess Daly, are joined by the spooky judges Craig Revel Horwood, Darcey Bussell, Len Goodman and Bruno Tonioli, along with our professionally realistic and somewhat shocking score in brackets below with the performances. Also joining is the exceptional live orchestra, headed by maestro Dave Arch.

The ever annoying sh*t stain that is Louis Smith was booked in the audience by the pathetic BBC after failing to listen to public opinion. Will the ghost of Jimmy Savile appear tonight?

Patrick and Anya

Quickstep

Man With the Hex – Atomic Fireballs

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Comedy face. Into hold non eventful. Nothing movement to influence others watching. Good kicks. Capable around floor. Feels empty. Anya zombiefied and limp in story, saved by Patrick. Finally giving some funky footwork with strong oomph. Lacking star punch.

Len – Lack of body contact. Liked the speed.

Bruno – The magic spell you concocted had all the right ingredients. More content in that then you’ve ever had. Frame bit loose. Maintain the frame.

Craig – I can only but agree. Energy was phenomenal. Loved theatricality. Full of character. Timing, as always, exceptional.

Darcey – Anya, you’ve worked with Patrick’s strengths. That was fast. Well done.

8,9,9,8 (6)

Fiona and Anton

Charleston

Jeepers Creepers – Al Donahue

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Enacting a rigormortis scarecrow into hold Fiona found the floor with a good but timid pace. Somewhat distilled in pace but decent with leg flying lifts spinning around. Anton steps over Fiona through legs followed with a run around a leapfrog atop back. Was fun but very limp overall. Not strong enough in character and belief to just go for it.

BT– Like Halloween at Doris Day’s house. Lacked kind of fire Charleston had. Be aware of timing. When you go out of sync with Anton it really shows.

CRH – Too light and well behaved. Timing, as Bruno said was out. But, on the good side you do have a fantastic amount of swivel.

Bruce asks comments from Dave next.

DB – Darcey.

BF – It says Dave!

Bruno quips in – She looks particular butch today.

Seemingly knocked, Darcey solemnly responds – For me what you do brilliantly is you tell a story. Nice and cheeky but you are out of time. Still on your way up.

Just a minute, George.

LG – I don’t agree with these people. I thought it was a proper Charleston. I think I’m right. Well done.

6, 7, 8, 7 (6)

Get ready ladies its Big Ben time.

Ben smiles and waves.

Ben and Kristina

Paso Doble

Supermassive Black Hole – Muse

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Timid steps from full bodily exposed Ben. Wafts cap around to hide inaccuracy. Kristina pulls Ben across floor in laughable exchange. Kristina twirls around Ben on the spot. Ben moves around with Kristina on the floor. Very slow. On the spot dancing with no impact or skill. Boring and only body show off to win votes. Lame.

CRH – Got to admit I was slightly distracted. Little bit blocky and without shape.

DB – The attack, dance content much more. If you’re gonna show it off, use it. Gave me great lasting image, thank you very much.

LG – Looking at you we’ve got so much in common. Was looking for fireworks, there was none. It was an Explosion! Could have more finesse.

BT – Now were starting to guess it. With all that muscle you can outdo the Minotaur.

Ben asks to be shown and jumps up to stand behind Bruno in the man behind ass in anal position to please gay fans as well as women for votes based on lacklustre dancing. BBC continues to be full of smut. Many ‘real’ gay people in the community are upset with such tacky representation as a dirty perv lusting over any body.

7,8,9,8 (3)

Sophie and Brendan

Jive

Maneater – Hall and Oates

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Marauding down the stairs come both into a spin of no real impact. On floor Bextor footing and momentum lost. Minimal action and leggy walking again while titled over Brendan’s head with a cartwheel once more which is a LIFT. Brendan loves to always break the rules. It can’t compensate for a terrible dance with no skill.

DB – Jive is high, fast energy with sharp kicks. Knees all way through are bent. Didn’t get into any sharp kicks. Let me down.

Len – Come out with more confidence and impact. So much more that could come out. Get out and attack it.

BT – Bit heavy and leggy. Wonderful sense of style. Require much more precision. Timing wasn’t always as good as usually is.

Brendan answers back once again.

6, 7, 8, 7 (2)

Natalie and Artem

Viennese Waltz

Devil in Me – Natalie Duncan

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Rising from the center among the mist, graceful undead Natalie glides perfectly with Vamp Artem. Excellent arm extensions. Great in hold tender and smooth effervescence. Composed, effortless, excellent footwork and armographies.

LG – Let me say that was lovely. Challenge of Viennese Waltz is to stay in hold. Feeling of an American Smooth. It was lovely.

BT – “This was magic!”

CRH – You make me sick, darling. Fab-u-lous!

DB – Expect so much from you. You never disappoint. A dream.

9, 10, 9, 10 (10)

Mark and Iveta

Paso Doble

I Lost My Heart to a Starship Trooper – Sarah Brightman

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Spaceman Mark descends from space to emerge from his capsule to seduce alien Iveta. In hold strong frontal focus. Working Iveta well in hold. Somewhat resigned however with Iveta circling around him. Very wait for Iveta to come to me and not in a leadership way. Great performance with strong beam up to Babylon 5.

BT – Its Astro Dave! Fun but not quite right content. I loved it but not really a Paso.

CRH -Little bit heavy, stompy. Isolation good. Rhythm fantastic.

DB – Entertainment, conviction, attack all there. Curve elbows.

LG – Houston we got a problem. Long on performance, short on technique.

BF – Is that it?

LG – Been told to be quick.

6, 6, 7, 6 (4)

Rachel and Pasha

American Smooth

I Put a Spell on You by Screamin’ – Jay Hawkins

rachel pasha 6

As a portrait coming to life through the Strictly cobwebs Pasha guides his partner out. She could have done it herself. In hold spin around by Pasha just happy to be there. Too meek and left and right with arms and movement. Fair lifts add to feeling of dance. Trying hard but still not pushing that hidden thing inside enough to really dazzle. Too timid. Find the killer instinct.

CRH – Welcome back darling in the competition.

DB – Difference from last week. Loved it. Transformation in your top line. Point feet in lifts.

LG – You’re best dance tonight.

BT – Zombie bride has found her mojo.

7, 7, 8, 8 (6)

Ashley and Ola

Tango

Beautiful Monster – Neyo

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Creepy Ola catches up with prowling Ashley mirroring sharp arm movements. Into hold very slow move around looking lost for a second. Recovers with spin around but checking place to travel to next. Trying hard sharp flicks too awkwardly. Very rushed and tentative. Good spin glide around of Ola held by Taylor hands. Decent effort, but missing some key elements.

DB –I’m really attracted to the evil Ashley. Staccato. Very nice all way through.

LG – Detail is missing. Just the small things. Get top better. Polish it up.

BT – Nightstalker takes his prey. Had menacing power to it. Now, you have to go to next stage. Polish technique.

CRH – Aggressive, dark, mysterious I really loved it, Sort, your, head out!

8, 9, 8, 8 (8)

Abbey and Aljaz

Rumba

Stay – Shakespeare’s Sister

abbey aljaz 6

Curtain drape train broken from Abbey into Aljaz’s arms slow and tender adding to strength of dance. Little too slow to next part of routine, however. Good feet pointed down to floor on Aljaz drag. Lifted legs too high pertaining a lift. Bit too dependent on Aljaz.

For only seven weeks training you are amazing

BT – Abbey, you’re here to stay.

CRH – One word, Im-pressive.

DB – Just watch smooth transitions between each move. Chemistry, brilliant.

8, 8, 9, 9 (7)

Dave and Karen

Jive

Monster Mash – Bobby Boris Picket

dave karen 6

Karen in the Batmobile starts being chased by Dave behind her just walking and then standing behind her. Dave sways around following Karen around the room. In hold dances on spot with nothing of interest. Extends limp arm on occasion. Fun filled joker may soon be flying off. Terrible tragedy.

BT – Listen, it was a soft show shuffle of mashed potatoes. Jive was non-existent. I have to be truthful.

CRH – Little bit like the weather. Cloudy, grey and dismal,

DB – I know you tried really hard. Get on balls of feet.

LG – Like a Cumberland sausage chasing the mustard.

4, 5, 6, 4 (1)

Susanna and Kevin

Charleston

Bad Moon Rising by Creedance Clearwater Revival

susanna kevin

After waking from the movies, making it to the floor footwork and lindy hops kept well to tone of dance. Good lift by Kevin. Strange lift of Susanna’s full frontal lady area on spin around kicks very perverse for the BBC. Average work following on floor. Nothing great, nothing bad. Ends on lift.

CRH – What I love about you is you take full advantage of freedom of expression. Really, really enjoyed it.

DB – Sweet, fun cheeky. Like a little bit more crispness in the moves.

LG – Good technique. Plenty of treats.

BT – Have you got him house trained? Totally charmed. You give so much joy to everything you do. Sidekicks absolutely wonderful.

8, 8, 9, 9 (8)

Danger zone

Rachel, Dave and Fiona

Results to follow…

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Strictly Come Dancing Results: Week 5

SCD Results: Week 5

tess claude 5

Tonight’s results are revealed from Tess and Claude. Tess tells us the first couple going through to next week in no particular order is – Fiona and Anton. Following them through to week six are – Susanna and Kevin, Natalie and Artem, Mark and Iveta, Rachel and Pasha.

The first couple to grace the bottom two for the dance off is – Deborah and Robin.

Earth, Wind and Fire

Medley

earth wind and fire

Get ya groove on tonight! Disco, Motown and R’n’B Legends Earth wind and Fire were literally on it. Professional, groovy, fun and talented, this is how music was, is and remains at its strongest. It was yet another excellent performance from the funksters with a Boogie Wonderland follow through on a jam packed Medley.Pitch and picture perfect. Sheer legendary talent, not even rusty.

Len’s Lens

It’s time once more to peer down the all-seeing lens of Len, capturing all the unseen, juicy extras. Craig was unable to scale the stairs and was live via downstairs video screen. Up for discussion this week in fuller detail was Anton being patted down with flannel from Fiona in routine. Ashley’s leapfrog flip with styled bouffant working of Bert was gazed upon. Artem nailed by fictional man beater Natalie was shown were Art was smashed in the nose which injured him. Patrick and Dave were also peered into further. Aljaz serves Craig a cocktail at the judges desk. Was it a Peña colada? Len fishing out a booger failed to be shown.

The results return to reveal the next couple through which is – Sophie and Brendan. Also joining is Ashley and Ola, Abbey and Aljaz, Dave and Karen.

The couple comprising the other half of the dance off is Patrick and Anya. Ben and Kristina sail through to the next week.

The dance off

 

Deborah and Robin

Viennese Waltz

It’s a Man’s World – James Brown

The table just took too much time away from any impact the dance could have. It was a pointless addition. Minimal steps from Deb, though competent. Contemporary Viennese Waltz in a Tango setting wasn’t beneficial. Let that be a lesson to all prop users.

Patrick and Anya

Salsa

Wings – Little Mix

Strong sense of character and style despite lacking areas with hand injury. Showing good interest in partner more. Very good synchronicity.

The Judges Vote

judges 5

Craig – I would like to save couple i thought did best dancing in dance off tonight. Patrick and Anya.

Darcey – Wish both couples weren’t even here. I would like to save Patrick and Anya.

Bruno – Both did a great job. One of you had edge for me. Patrick and Anya.

Len – I would have agreed. Deborah you did much better in that dance off.

Deborah – Strictly gave me a gift but biggest gift is this guy. (To Robin) He’s the best.

Teary Robin struggles with the words and hugs Deb instead.

Deborah said she enjoyed the Quickstep most and was happy with the Strictly experience given to her.

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Strictly Come Dancing: Week 5

Strictly Come Dancing, Week 5

bruce and tess 5

Week five of the Strictly dance fest continues on with the glammed up judges Craig Revel Horwood, Darcey Bussell, Len Goodman and Bruno Tonioli, along with our professional score in brackets below with the performances. Also joining are the sophisticated hosts Sir Bruce Forsyth and Tess Daly, with the exceptional live orchestra, headed by maestro Dave Arch.

Judge Craig has recently had his prolonged hip operation and was sat in a glitzed up orthopedic chair many felt resembled Darth Vader’s deathstar takeover and the Mastermind seat.

scd judges 5

Beginning the fifth week are…

Natalie and Artem

Samba

Bamboleo – Gypsy Kings

natalie artem 5

Technical steps and routine looking effortless. Looks like female professional. Good but tone slightly simmered down. Needed a bit of pizazz for leading to the big finish. Very good entry for Week 5, but tad flat.

Len – Palpitating, perspiration  and fluctuating. Loved that choreography. Could have had tad more bounce overall. That was great.

Bruno – Hypnotic, exotic with a touch of the erotic. You extend your lines right to the limit, without missing a bit. I love seeing these things.

Craig – Hide your double bounce action. Elbows little bit too close to your body. Hips were fantastic. Timing brilliant. Nothing you can’t do darling.

Darcey – What a lovely opening performance. On kick, don’t let sporting leg bend.

8,9,9,9 (8)

Abbey and Aljaz

Foxtrot

Dear Darlin’ – Olly Murs

abbey aljaz 5

Aljaz whisks Abbey into hold tenderly. Good begin from Abbey being commanded with smooth grace. Good twirl round. Compact arms with Aljaz extensions while joined in hold. Good spin and stop suddenly in tune with music and routine. Kept theme of dance perfectly.

Bruno – What a beauty. Really has feel of love letter to set to music. Chemistry between you two is literally tangible. You even attempted three underarm spins. You did it my darling, almost picture perfect.

Craig – Absolutely loved the story, continued through the dance. You need to extend your top line some more.

Darcey – You bring a wonderful understanding to the role. Get more stretch on your back leg. Then it would be all perfectly matched.

Len –You are consistent. This was no exception. Like a sea, an ocean, wave after wave of effortless movement around  the floor.

8,9,9,9 (8)

Dave and Karen

Salsa

Cuban Pete – Jim Carrey (OST to The Mask)

dave karen 5

In this one, Dave’s woman Karen was sporting a fruit salad on her head. It wasn’t Paloma Faith returning, yet. Shades of “WTF has she got on ‘er ‘ed?’ rang with viewers. Dave undertook some sloth yoga therapy to find his character in the dance.

A strong shake of Dave’s maracas gave good party feeling and a cool side to side sway motion on the floor. Next was a dreadful potter around with comedic apathy following into the routine onward. Minimal hand cross arounds. Fumbly and limp after from Funky Monkey Dave. Fun thrill presence there but needed something strong. Just like last week was a week 1 performance as Dave ‘begins’ to dance, this was a week 2 act. Dave needs to catch up and the comedy routine has shown its effect. Move it or lose it. Karen then chose to eat a banana as the judges gave comments. When are you going to dance?

dave karen banana 4

Fruit of the loom

Craig – Perhaps you should have considered remaining on the fruit trolley. When Conga music came in, I started to get excited then it sort of all curdled.

Darcey – The beginning, balancing on trolley, worried about falling on it. Out of sync all the way through. It lucky never a boring performance.

Len – Unique ability of never letting your left leg know what your right leg’s gonna do. The bottom line, it’s not top quality dancing. Its top quality fun and entertainment.

Bruno – Well I tell you what it is. Strictly Come Dancing presents, Crackers with Maracas 2. A falling off the trolley. I think you’re going for a record. I don’t think anyone has managed to be off time all the way through.

3,5,5,4 (4)

Deborah and Robin

Viennese Waltz

It’s A Man’s World – James Brown

deb robin 5

Does every routine have to involve office stationary ‘cos Deb’s is from Dragon’s Den? Sort it out BBC. The pair began pushing a table around. That doesn’t constitute dancing because they weren’t in hold. Loss of points is and should have been with judges, drastic here. Sorry, but this was just plain stupidity. Lot of time lost. Good when in hold with Robin. Holding firm in lone appeal. Good back dip down. Tight finish, out of nowhere.

Darcey – It was an interesting twist. Keep hold of top line. It’s only thing lets you down. Confidence is all back.

Len – Viennese Waltz is a romantic sort of a dance. In hold a touch of Mills and Boon. Beginning was more like meals on wheels. Improvement on last week.

Bruno – Romance went out of the window. It was a bitter divorce. Give me the table! Work on your posture Much more fluid.

Craig – Agree, topline absolute disaster tonight. But, really like you did Spanish paso centerpiece to that.

6,7,7,7 (5)

Patrick and Anya

Salsa

Wings – Little Mix

patrick anya 5

Strong personification. Needs to come across as strong in a unique way to capture audience fuller in respect and launch as a competitor to other dance pairs. Burlesque start from Anya grabs choir boy Patrick into dance. Strong on spot rhythm. Good stand alone movement. Leading Anya well in synchronised motions. Decent twirls of Anya and maintain character in dance. Could have a tad more but still very good overall and battled through injury successfully.

Len – You should feel right at home, your wrist and Craig’s hip, it’s like Casualty. Wonderful job changing around giving Patrick a routine with one hand. Brilliant. Did a really good job under terrible circumstances.

Bruno – Bit like a switch going on and off tonight. Bit stiff. Felt slightly unfinished. Understand circumstances not in your favour. Slightly loose and unfinished, for me.

Craig – Have to agree. Should be a flow to it, you still could have got that with one arm, actually. You do naturally have fantastically good hips. Great rhythm.

Darcey – For me you directed Anya. Very impressive from all the chances gone through.

6,8,7,7 (7)

Fiona and Anton

Quickstep

If My Friends Could See Me Now – Shirley MacLaine (OST to Sweet Charity)

fiona anton 5

After a welcome from her James Bond, and ours (Give it three months and we’ll tell you why) Sir Roge wished his Bond girl well in the competition.

A treat to tea and champers from Anton. No. Good in hold with Anton around. Good leg work with one in air. Begins hops. Bit too hoppy. At times Anton hopping her along. Kept competence. Very strong hop and connection together at end.

Bruno – Fiona finally putting on the glitz. Such flair, moved better, couple mistakes in the footwork. You covered it well. We didn’t notice covered it well

Craig – Well I certainly noticed in upstaged section in Charleston. Completely  awry. Flew round the room. Defiantly back in the room.

Darcey – Light on your feet. Keep that focus.

Len – More confidence, plus more focus plus content equals more points.

7,7,8,8 (7)

Rachel and Pasha

Paso Doble

Maneater – Nelly Furtado

rachel pasha 5

Sexy and sultry leg awkward. Shouldn’t have been give alone segment like that. Still needs protection. Too awkward tilts back. Limp tame of Pasha. Hair and make up really adds to dance and looks ghastly. Is it Halloween yet? Pasha turns Rachel around floor before end falling flat. Unnatural instinct to dancing. Simply has “not got it.” Terrible by some standards. Falling all over the place, unstable and trying way too hard spoiled the routine somewhat, despite effort.

Brucie cracks a joke. “Why didn’t you get him a ladder and a little bell?” to which Pasha was perplexed.

Craig – So much tension in that felt it was like a whole heap of trees being felled, really. Too stiff. Drama you set up the top, I didn’t find compelling. Because you don’t dance it well enough alone. Would have been better in hold. Balance issues. Littered with a little bit of dis-a’h’s-ter darling.

Darcey – I can see you’ve worked hard. It’s hard for a girl as a matador to have that convictions. Needed to be crisper and sharper. If you focus with your eyes it can all come together.

Len – I feel bad. I know that you’ve really worked hard. Unfortunately this wasn’t a dance that suits your personality. Just didn’t quite work.

Bruno – It’s hard being a maneater! I can do it. You had all the content there but it was the vegetarian version. Come here and FIGHT! Fight for your place on Strictly.

Pasha defianlty thinks it was good. This is a problem coming through. Pasha, it wasn’t great. You have

to understand that and this will help you both avoid the dance off. There seems to be too high an expectancy assuming partner can handle alone motions. Not yet so don’t give it to her freely and integrate with hold and release moments.

4,6,6,6 (4)

Mark and Iveta

Waltz

Apologize – One Republic

mark iveta 5

After gaining some tips form Esther Ranthzen’s sister, presumably Mark found his inner grace. Square steps back, side, up and side were okay but confined to spot. Little too fast on turn nearly losing footing. Made moment very awkward with rest of routine. Decent recovery. Good overall.

Darcey -Your tenderness, your care – I liked it

Len – Easy on the eye. Lifted your shoulder. Lost posture a bit. Lovely naturalness.

Bruno – Always so effective because so deeply felt. Like a top politician, you put your spin and we believe it. Great performance.

Craig – So much better than that ghastly dance last week. Danced simply, effectively and with emotion.

7,7,7,7 (7)

Ashley and Ola

Jive

Johnny B Goode – Chuck Berry

ashley ola 5

Ashley is up next, sporting the Billy Joel come Punk Rocker of bubblegum pop hairdo. He begins playing a guitar prop. Tentative steps and arms on floor with Ola. Leggy Ola flung over Ashley and nearly losing balance. Didn’t have such desired effect of more it aimed to achieve. Very slowed down. Followed by good leg around spin.  No air guitar? Boo! You tricked us for the Bingo daub. 😮

Len –Speed, energy plenty of guercha! (?)

Bruno – Was it Elvis or Shakin’ Stevens. You had foot on accelerator but kicks and flicks must be much sharper and cleaner.

Craig – Saw your recovering from your knee slide, that was a bit undainey wasn’t it? They’ve probably got that on camera somewhere for It Takes Two.

(Len seen fishing out a crusty one. Wonder if Len’s Lens will pick this up?)

len crusty one 5

Len goes for a cheeky crusty one. (Sorry!)

Got to be aware you do have feet. They need pointing and working on.

Darcey – That wasn’t safe, wasn’t placed. It was brilliant. Loved energy. All way through you kept it up. Feet needed to point.

Tess – The weave. Lovin’ the weave.

Ashley – It’s Burt.

Looks like he needs an Ernie. 🙂

7,8,8,8 (7)

Susanna and Kevin

American Smooth

On The Sunny Side of the Street – Dorothy Fields

susanna kevin 5

The purple and yellow clothing on Kevin was very Fred Astaire. Susanna gave a very good start with strong charisma from the pair. Arms seemingly flighty, in a positive sense. Half-hearted ankle kicks. Effortless lift by Kevin. Strong power swirl around with beaming end.

Bruno – You really exude happiness. Uplifting. Fantastic to watch. Good lifts, great performance.

Craig – One word. Gor-ghus!

Darcey – Focus you give to dance is bang on. Have confidence in your man. Lovely.

Len – Smooth, suave and sophisticated.

 8,8,8,8 (8)

Ben and Kristina

Quickstep

The Rembrandts – I’ll Be There for You

ben kristina 5

Brucie gave Ben a funny “Woo!” after explaining the crowd’s tacky responses to female (and male) delights of fancying Ben. It is his own trait on votes, though, isn’t it? We then saw a full on crotch shot of Ben. There are no words. *rolls eyes*

What is this?! Ben and Kristina sat around on a sofa watching TV and throwing popcorn in the air with no chemistry upon glancing each other in amazement to launch into a pillow fight. This is so worthy of a ten in the future. After their god-awful time waste the pair, goofed teeth, trotted back and forth awfully. Once in hold, jittery feet around the floor from Cohen. Awkward spins and facing forward. No connection with partner. One move only, side to side fast walking up to sofa again. Smiling block of boredom beefy “Big Ben” strikes again. Ding dong it wasn’t. Does this constitute as a Quickstep? Or shall we vote because we fancy a model in the shop window. How much? Woof woof.

Craig – I thought you were a little bit out of your comfort zone. Loved your face.

Darcey – I disagree. Wasn’t expecting you be so light on your feet. I need you to up the difficulty.

Len – I agree. Throughout the evening there’s been a lot of couples messing about.I do understand, you’ve gotta fill up the time, as a professional, how better than setting on a settee throwing popcorn at each over or wheeling a table about. I wanna see fuller routines from everyone.

Bruno – Carried on any longer I may have joined in and brought a pizza. We want the full monty darling. We want the full whack!

6,7,7,7 (4)

ben kristina judges 5

Rihanoff’s reaction to “Full Monty.”

Sophie and Brendan

Cha Cha

PYT (Pretty Young Thing) – Michael Jackson

sophie brendan 5

After a long time wafting around the curtains, Sophie greeted the dancefloor. It was incredibly bland. Walk and smile only, spin around from Brendan and moving of legs side to side. Mannequin Sophie Ellis Waxtor losing footing slightly. Followed up by choosing to walk around the floor again, as previous. Lots of flash dance from Brendan. No steps, interested or thrill for sympathy vote Sophe. The BBC are ‘high’ on Sophie and will no doubt once again talk up the bias now.

Darcey – Knees little soft. So beautifully musical.

Len – Well for me it was competent. I don’t think you got into that dance at all. Staged. Little bit brittle. Didn’t feel it had that sort of tick, wasn’t raunchy. Didn’t have any interplay.

Brendan butts in – Oh, I had some interplay, don’t you worry about that…

LG – You may have done when you were rehearsing, I didn’t see it out here.

Bruno – I thought it was a bit of a saucy vixen sashay with style. Different approach. Stylish feel. I thought it was very nice.

Brendan – Shall we skip Craig?

Craig – Make sure you keep dancing when you’re walking. Spot when you’re turning, because you almost fell over. Thought it was rather good.

Tip for Brendan. Can you, for once, just shut it? It doesn’t make TV to be constantly and bitterly asinine, darling. Whining constantly won’t help you succeed.

7,8,7,8 (3)

After all have performed as Tess discusses the scores and who may grace the “danger zone.” A line from us. Thanks love. 🙂

So then, who is comprising the danger zone (from us) ?

Danger Zone

Deborah, Rachel and Patrick

Results to follow…

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BBC

Strictly Come Dancing Results: Week 4

Strictly Results,  Week 4

I Give It A Year - After Party - London

This week’s results are in as hostess Tess reveals which couples will dance again next week in no particular order. Safe for now is Mark and Iveta, Natalie and Artem, Deborah and Robin, Abbey and Aljaz, Ashley and Ola.
The first couple facing the dance duel is Rachel and Pasha. Shock? Maybe but it was only a matter of time. Must drive harder in transparency and deliverance instead of over concentrating on the night which can suffer awkwardness with routine.

Andrea Begley

Dancing in the Dark

andrea begley scd

Winner of The Voice UK series 2 takes to her debut performance with her first single. Partially sighted Andrea gave a smooth, evangelic start to the song with a mellow tone throughout.

 

Len’s lens

Once again we peer through the lens of Len to discover all the extra missed bits from Saturdays glitzed up show. On offer this from the judges and host Claudia Winkleman were Mark and Iveta replay f slowed down voice from Mark for Len’s pleasure. Bruno added “Looked like a huge golden carp gasping for air.” Len critiques Patrick’s Cha Cha with good rhythm. Darcey discusses Ben’s lift of Kristina tossing her round like a rag doll. Craig was asked about Natalie’s cane catching capabilities. Claude moves on to Ashley’s arms. Craig and Bruno debated the stiffness. Swan Lake demo from Bruno also. Bruno and judges laughed hysterically over a gaff on Rachel’s comments as Tonioli laughed his backside off his chair.

bruno off chair

Off his rockin’ chair

 

Next batch safe is – Ben and Kristina, Sophie and Brendan, Patrick and Anya, Dave and Karen and Susanna and Kevin.

The couple facing the dance off is Julien and Janette while Fiona and Anton are safe to next week.

 

Keane

Everybody’s Changing

keane

Belting out one of their greatest hits was “BRIT Award winners” Keane, Tess mentioned at the beginning of the programme. A good composition for the show’s surrounding and sang well once again. Oh, hang on, this is the new guy who is in one of the four seats for The Voice UK series 3. (Under filming) Did you just tweak that?

 

The dance off

Rachel and Pasha

Quickstep

Johnny Got a Boom Boom – Imelda May

 

Too much time focusing on the safe instead of getting into dance does impact dance. Riley had a few similar kicks and seemed to be enjoying it a little more than first time. More comfortable on the floor but should have that first time round to avoid. Her clothes didn’t help either with viewers. Not one part of them matches. Eying the glitterball may be a huge ay off if she continues this rate of play.

 

Julien and Janette

Salsa

Spice Up Your Life – The Spice Girls

 

Guilty pleasure Julien works his partner well and keeps strength in his own independence on the floor. Good arms wrap around again. Working enthusiasm on the floor. Despite dance lack in parts, has one of the best partnerships in the contest which has been key to survival too.

 

The Judges Vote

strictly judges

Craig – Dance the best on the night, Rachel and Pasha.

Darcey – Both hundred times better from last night. For me, goes down to difficulty of the dance. Rachel and Pasha.

Bruno – I have to go for content, skill and storytelling. My favourite dance was from Rachel and Pasha.

Len – I would have voted exactly the same. Rachel and Pasha.

Julien thanked for his experience “Like to thank all the people who voted at home and the audience. The judges, even Craig. Had an amazing time, best experience of my life. I hope I’ve spiced up “everybody’s life up.

Janette said of her partner MacDonald “I don’t know someone who has put in most hours to make it work. As my first partner on Strictly, I’m so happy.”

Strictly’s guilty pleasure is now gone and there is no room for error from the rest of the dancing pack.

 

Strictly Bingo

A couple more dabs have come off! Come on Strictly, go the whole hog over the series.

scd bingo copy

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BBC

Telegraph

Strictly Come Dancing, Week 4

Strictly opens for week number four of the glitzy dance contest. We can instantly see Kevin’s geeky yet chic-cy braces. Back are the judges Craig Revel Horwood, Darcey Bussell, Len Goodman and Bruno Tonioli, alongside our professional opinion in brackets.

Also back fit and well is Sir Bruce Forsyth and glamour girl Tess Daly.

Sophie and Brendan

Foxtrot

 Cheek to Cheek – Dick Haynmes

sophie brendan 4

Cop out dance again in Ballroom.

Decent into hold around but very slow and seemingly stiff facially. Very slow and easy to musicality. Good turn around. Really boring and minor footsteps. Reliant on turns only. Uber safe and rubbish. No real partnership shown.

Craig will be having hip operation soon. Wished well by colleagues.

Len – No messing about, straight into routine. Loved the routine. Loved the dancing

BT- Really look like a Hollywood star. Sustain (inaudible).

CRH – Elegant, graceful. Fabulous pivots darling.

DB – Really gave Sophie a hard foxtrot. Let shoulders rise. Style and grace all way through. Beautiful.

8, 9, 9, 9 (4)

Bulls**t factor continues. It was nowhere near an 8 or 9, but hey, BBC wants to keep her in.

Fiona and Anton

Rumba

World of Our Own – Westlife

fiona anton 4

Spin around. Looks lost. Slow stopping in middle before next move. Glide along release throw uneventful. Spinning on spot good for Fiona. Mild, boring and drab despite effort.

BT – Packing enticing at beginning. Few issues. With Fluidity. You know. Can’t just stop and start. I still think you have it but concentrate sustaining your performance. We all make mistakes.

CRH – Hip action very, very stiff and plonky. Exit from floor spin a bizarre jump lacked bit of rhythm. Balance went.

DB – You do lose focus. Please don’t show it. So much in you, you’ve got to survive. Bring out the fighter.

LG – Rumba is such a slow, precise dance. Liked attitude.

Fiona- I thought there was only one issue, at the end?

LG – I enjoyed watching you as I always do.

4, 6, 6, 6 (3)

Mark and Iveta

Cha Cha

U Can’t Touch This – MC Hammer

mark iveta

Urban rap and hip hop. Rock fingers. Bless you Brucie but that’s the rock fingers pose. Ghetto Blaster. Bit half hearted, hand and finger moves only. Stand on the spot dancing. Slapstick moves.

CRH – have to say cant believe the audience. Very flat footed and stompy. Danced, I’m afraid, very badly.

DB – Great action. It was great. Worked hard on the details. Loved it.

LG – You’re full of talent, I won’t tell you what Craig’s full off. Do it again.

BT – MC Mark! Plenty of bling I tell you. Was unique and memorable and very funny.

3, 8, 8, 7 (1)

Ashley and Ola

Viennese Waltz

Angel – Sarah McLachlan

ashley ola 4

Slow walk up and back into arm hold. Caress the air. Bit blasély flim flam arms on Dawson. Very slow turn around on spot partnership. Ends center boring. Good start very boring. Anticlimactic.

DB – A little too safe. Elegance in your top line. Push yourself a little bit hard.

LG – Had romance, elegance. Little bit wafty on occasions. Needed, for me, bit more gusto.

BT – Didn’t mind wafting at all. Tender, romantic, give it more woof. Riot!

CRH – Only thing that bothered me were arms out of hold. Seemed unnatural. Quite bizarrely stiff.

7, 8, 8, 8 (5)

Julien and Janette

Salsa

Spice Up Your Life – The Spice Girls

julien jan 4

Hip gyration. Getting into dance. Glitzy Spin round. Strong split drop through. Decent arm work. Good half squat shimmy. Party spirit infectious.

LG – Liked your attitude. Needed bit more control. Dynamic, terrific.

BT – Definitely high on spice. I have to tell the truth, you threw yourself into it. You have to go with it. Worst thing is your timing. You’re trying so hard.

BF – He was on the beat more times.

CRH – No rotation whatsoever in hip. Lacked musicality, that is your problem I think.

DB – Fun and dynamic there. It is just your middle, but I think that was your best dance.

4, 6, 7, 6 (4)

Rachel and Pasha

Quickstep

Johnny Got a Boom Boom – Imelda May

rachel pasha 4

Cracking safe. Pointless before getting into dance. Fair start around with Riley. Keeping up with time. Ticking the feet placement box. Decent. Trying but stuck in strictly limbo. Tick off the glitterball on your bingo cards! Safe again. Attire?

BT – Just about got away with it. What you need is control.

CRH – Thing really let that down was your top line. Looked like you flung about. Tighten your bum cheeks darling, then you will glide beautifully.

DB – Very challenging. Watch you don’t grip on his shoulder. Grip and core.

LG – Quantity of steps. As it went on you lost your posture a little. Lovely footwork. Focus.

5, 7, 7, 7 (5)

Ben and Kristina

Salsa

Hard to Handle – The Black Crowes

ben kristina 4

Life size car situated in the centre as prop. Limp arms and walk. Points to pecs as defining feature. Walks around Kristina. Pulls shirt off to reveal vest to predictable girls screams. Catches Kristina and hurls her around and down. Steps over her and picks her up. Dips her down a bit. Rihanoff sits atop crotch and sways hair around. Also gives ‘gays’ the wrong and perverted connotation of disgust many in the community dislike. Lift? Allowed, but hardly any good with just Kristinea raised onto his crotch.

This week Ben made sure he did all the PR photoshoots for the ‘gays’ in only his pants and ironing in them. Pathetic attempt for votes that ruins the show, his ‘foundation’ and fragmented audiences he claims to continue to promote for them. As long as it supports his own, charity, with a lovely PR tweet, that’s all good, right?

CRH – Ticks every box.

DB – Certainly handle Kristina with ease. You’re having fun I love it .

Ben kisses Darcey.

LG – That was terrific.

BT – Surprisingly smooth. I want to see more of you.

8, 8, 8, 7 (3)

Are the judges on rohiponol? Biased bull and lame show tonight. Costing you whatever ‘credibility’ you supposedly have.

Deborah and Robin

Jive

Making your mind up – Bucks Fizz

deb robin 4

Atop judges table, Bucks Fizzing. Robin pulls trousers off to glitz up. Glitter tights don’t count. Deb then removes to show a glitzy skirt, not tights. Big pull off only moment and lost lot of time as Deb was carried around by Robin. To improve need to step up the dance involvement than rely on Robin alone.

DB – Little soft. Missed confident self. This wasn’t your dance.

LG – Plenty of Fizz, gotta buck your feet up. Went wrong couple of times. Work on technique a bit.

BT – Light hearted fun. Technique wasn’t strong enough.

CRH – No real spring in your steps. Kicks very, very lame. Not your dance.

5, 6, 6, 6 (3)

Natalie and Artem

Quickstep

Yeah – Usher

nat artem 4

Over sexualisation from BBC Strictly. When are we going to bury Jimmy Savile for good. BBC still allow such perversion to continue. It is coming from within.

Nat worried about early week rupturing her back. How will she fare?

Great jump up crossover steps from Gumede. Working baton very well. Into good spins around floor. Hopping along near perfection. Systematic, precise, in time feet. Keeping up with Artem. Good support drop down hold. Funky footwork from Artem. Great Jazz with Sass feel.

LG – Bit long getting started. Part in hold liked very much. Stopped in hold at short. Bit in hold I thought was great.

BT – Can’t believe level of dance in this short time. Like being there with you. You capture the spirit of the dance. Absolutely wonderful.

CRH – I agree. Loved the fusion of Quickstep and Jazz, There is not stopping you darling.

DB – Style just perfect. So much content.

9, 9, 8, 9 (8)

Patrick and Anya

Cha Cha

Mercy – Duffy

pat anya 4

Strong but no defining features. Can’t put a finger on why you would keep him around. What makes him a selling point? Great guy, good dancer but average with hazy memorability.

BT – Very sensual. Best dance yet.

CRH – Absolutely brilliant.

DB – So confident out of hold. You have an inner groove, I’m loving it.

LG – Its happy hour. Best dance ever.

8, 8, 9, 8 (5)

SCD starting to lose its selling point over X Factor by borrowing and playing to its crowd whilst over-sexualising everything on sustained levels of perversion.

Abbey and Aljaz

Tango

Say my name – Florence and the Machine

abbe aljaz 4

Long getting in hold. Smooth join up. Sharp turns and focal points. Good head spin. Strong partnership connection. Feet moving well. Bit walk along after. Wrap around leg on Aljaz ankle.

CRH – Used accents in music to brilliant effect. Attack, purpose. A-may-zing.

DB – Played very sexy, cool Tango. Great strength throughout.

LG – In ballroom you are a formidable couple. Punchy, dynamic. Terrific Tango.

BT – Power, drama, passion, beauty. You had it all.

9, 8 9, 9, (8)

Dave and Karen

Waltz

Take It To The Limit – The Eagles

dave karen 4

Kicks open red carpet. Awkward steps back and forth like “a peacock with constipation.” Trying to dance but took too long on week 4 after fun moments. Now enters a week 1 performance. Slow, mundane and disjointed. Jumps in glee of completion at end. Lift.

DB – Soften hose knees and travel.

LG – You’ve truly titivated yourself up. You try your hardest everytime.

BT – Still very, very nimble. Stuck on a point but is better.

CRH – Feel the music a lot more. Gaping going on. Nice to see serious Dave.

5, 6, 6, 6 (2)

Susanna and Kevin

Samba

Whenever, Wherever – Shakira

susanna kevin 4

Jungle theme. Gets onto floor. Strong presence. Good body shakes. Seeing a lot of Kevin’s work but not much of Susanna on floor. Does strong sexy poses but not much movement with feet in hold.

LG – You gave it plenty of att- bit messy here and there. It was good

BT – If you got it flaunt it. So much energy into that dance, time you finished little messy.

CRH – Thought was a bit muddy. At times fighting, going against one another. Lost impact. Think you can go further. It’s just okay.

DB – Like the wild Samba Queen. Couple muddy bits. Straighten back leg.

6, 7, 8, 8 (5)

 

Well, we certainly ticked off a few more Bingo daubs. We’ll wait till results to upload the weekly card.

 

Danger zone?

Julien, Patrick and Fiona

Results to follow…

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BBC

Strictly Come Dancing Week 3

Strictly Come Dancing Week 3

This week on Strictly is love week. Get the tissues at the ready. Beginning was a group marriage along with vicar Craig. He didn’t dance this week, but there is still time for that one. James and Ola ended the group dance by planting a cream pie into Craig’s face on either side. Poor guy. Make up will run.

scd wedding

Last week he was unwell but tonight Sir Brucie is back with Tess. Also joining are the judges Craig Revel Horwood, Darcey Bussell, Len Goodman and Bruno Tonioli. Also judging are us in brackets.

Abbey and Aljaz

Jive

Can’t buy me love – The Beatles

abbey aljaz 3

Abbey sits on the stage of Penny Lane for quite a while. Began slow. Once back into throes of routine lacked oomph in rhythm despite a good pace. Very careful. Not an easy dance coping well to hold it together but again rather bland. Lots of individuality. Less romantic with not much partnership bond in loving togetherness.

LG – Energy, enthusiasm great. Bit more swivel.  Overall good job.

BT – You can work that look baby. Leg, kicks and flicks have to be sharper. You can work that darling.

CRH – Sat for an awfully long time on Penny Lane. Timing was out at beginning. Slightly laboured. Lack a little bit of attack. (Pantomime crowd begins boo’ing) It’s only my opinion.

Bruno quickly adds – The girl worked so hard…

Working hard is one thing, but being on Strictly has its requirements. Isn’t a work hard come dancing and not anything else, is it?

DB – Energy and story was lovely.

6, 7, 8, 7 (6)

Patrick and Anya

Quickstep

Let there be Love – Nat King Cole

patrick anya 3

Good in hold, slow working. Lots of emphasis from Anya. No strong character of Patrick coming through. Ticked few boxes but not enough to secure votes. Pleasant but empty. Why would someone vote for him over the others?

BT – A distinguished kind of love, except when you got your feet in a twist. Moments little bit restrained. Keep the flow.

CRH – Would have liked to see little bit more movement. Gaping issues. You are style.

DB – Brought panache. Neat and tidy. Take risks. Very nice. Eye contact, I liked a lot.

LG – Very difficult dance. Style with a smile. Lovely.

6, 7, 7, 7 (7)

Dave and Karen

Paso Doble

I Would Do Anything for Love (But I Won’t Do That) –  Meat Loaf

dave karen 3

Dave claimed this maybe his signature dance. Not very loving but regardless, is the dance he’s doing. Looked more like a Mad Scientist in a cloak than the cape he swayed. Did well but most focus was swinging a cape. A way to hide his lack of dance skill can actually highlight it further. Karen strolls in. Lost tie lost. Out of time. Karen high kick. Dave commands. Not doing much. He won’t do that. On one knee. Does that add to lift rules? Swing around of Karen was a laugh.

Dave weighs up Craig’s puzzling face. Like a bulldog eating pickles, Dave says.

Bruce – Could you put your look into words?

CRH – One word. Dreadful

DB – Didn’t follow through with the shaping.

LG – You’re the people’s champion.

BT – Beyond description.

2, 5, 5, 4 (4)

Fiona and Anton

Waltz

True Love – Bing Crosby

fiona anton 3

Anton’s wearing white trousers this week. Might help if any mishaps occur. Walk around spin decent. Seemed more sombre than loving though. Graceful but lost in gaining bearings. Slightly forgettable despite  good effort and graceful end.

DB – Weren’t so many nerves there. Create more ability to use your neck. Very Beautiful.

LG – You playing Snakes and Ladders. Last week down now back up the ladder.

BT – Balance is better. Losing focus, don’t do that. You can do it.

CRH – Over balanced at one stage but managed to catch up. Timing slightly out. Thought wholething extremely elegant.

Happy birthday yesterday for Fiona Bruce informs us. Forsyth then stirs crowd to sing jolly “Happy Birthday” to Fullerton in a good touch.

7, 7, 7, 7 (6)

Rachel and Pasha

Cha Cha

When Love Takes Over – David Guetta feat. Kelly Rowland

rachel pasha 3

One extend move of elbow, hair straitening. Tender feet forward and back crossover. Lacking any sass on spin shimmy. Good memory of feet kicks. Over impactful on Pasha and not Rachel. Must dance not …

Sorry Rach, but its still a 6. Decent but not thrilling.

LG – occasionally u lose little bit off control.

BT – Starting to feel the tingle. Starting to use your assets to your advantage. Don’t doubt yourself.

CRH – Look of concentration was startling. Plonking your body down on all the finishes. Free arm placement much, much better.

DB – Cleaner, precise. Overall confidence, fabulous to watch.

6, 7, 7, 7 (6)

Mark and Iveta

American Smooth

It Must Be Love –  Madness

mark iveta 3

Iveta wants to dance instead of Autograph. Graceful. Turn around of Iveta awkward by Benton. Aeroplane arms bit timid. Good extensions though. Slow and uneventful. Needs more fluidity with content implementation. Disappointing without any lifts.

BT – You can tell a story. Couple of rough passages. Watch your turns. Storytelling – perfect.

CRH – Fantastic storyteller. Really got to work on your hands. Ruining your line. The finish will give you much better points from the judges.

DB – did miss glamorous flare. Use your height, extend, travel.

LG – You capture essence of every dance. What I love, watching you, you get it.

6, 6, 7, 7 (5)

Ben and Kristina

Rumba

Make you feel my love – Adele

ben kristina 3

Decent leg backs even though awkward. Good hips. Nice leg down arm out. Eye contact there but no real connection of partnership and just two people doing a dance to tick boxes.

Ben Cohen might be dreamy to many, but at some point the dream must end. Wont be long if no impact continues. Decent but limp 6.

CRH – I want to love you too my darling. Want you to dance well and you did. (Kisses Craig)

DB – I wanted to see connection and you gave it to me. Created true intensity.

BT – Nice to see a big butch bloke being gentle. Needed a bit more hips going on on occasion. Thought you showed your feminine side. (Alan Carr shown in audience, as BBC have aimed to groom him numerous times for the show as well as stereotype with ‘the gays.’)

BT – Like watching a series of erotic freezes. Whichever way you going, keep going you going well.

7, 7, 7, 7 (6)

Sophie and Brendan

Samba

All night long – Lionel Ritchie

sophie brendan 3

Flimsy arms. No real oomph in movement. Basic dance on own at a nightclub for Soph. Boring.

DB – dance content fabulous. Cool party vibe. More of a carnival vibe (like to see) Brilliant isolation. Such natural timing.

LG – Lacked a bit of tone. Full of all my greatest hits. Well done.

BT – Sophisticated Samba. Did it all without breaking a sweat.

CRH – Really loved it. Cleaner finish would have been great.

Need to justify last week’s nines.

7, 8, 8, 8 (3)

Julien and Janette

Jive

Everybody Needs Somebody To Love – The Blues Brothers

julien janette 3

Oh dear, he’s  doing the Jive. Suits personality, but good luck.

Strong start. Lost bit of arm movement, minor. Good work with partner. Keeping up well. For jive requirements.

LG –Really enjoyed it. Best dance to date.

BT – Played role right tonight. Full of wacky attitude. You went for it. If you stay in competition must focus on time. Energy was great.

CRH – Energy was great, little like three year old after a dance recital. Lots of energy which I loved.

DB – Certainly brought energy and love into your Jive. Crisper kick and flick. Only thing would polish your performance.

4, 5, 7, 6 (6)

Susanna and Kevin

Viennese Waltz

Annie’s Song – John Denver

susanna kevin 3

Good. Little lost in thought 1 minute through. Good spin around. Good technical tick of boxes but not memorable.

BT – Natural. So good to see.

CRH – Chin up, left shoulder down, darling. (Panto crowd Boo) I’m only trying to make it better for you darling.

DB – Some lovely extensions. Use your shoulders and upper body. Only in your top line. That’s it.

LG – This is love week and I’m in love with that Viennese Waltz. Lovely fluidity. Best I’ve seen tonight.

8, 9, 9, 8 (7)

Vanessa and James

Tango

Lay all your love on me – ABBA

vanessa james 3 (2)

Velvet braces on James.

Vanessa charges over and scares off the girls chatting with her man James. Pushing back strong. Into hold. Not bad. Struggling to make sharp attacks. Good through leg lift up. Throws James down. Good effort. Missing technique.

CRH – lacked little bit of attack???? Lacked a little bit of focus for me, and sharpness.

Vanessa instantly argues. “Your full of apasoo as ever.

Little tip for Vanessa. Being gobby to hide understand will not help you overall. You silence critics with talent, not senselessly arguing for no reason to gain some votes of sympathy alone. Acts like that usually leave the competition very quickly. Enormous progress to keep up with this dude. Honestly!

DB – Its not about liking the smell of your man. Keep your head away.

LG – Lot of content into that routine. Like a decaff coffee it looks okay but it lacked a bit of bite and a bit of snap.

BT – Good attitude. Messed up your footwork. You just stop driving the dance. Started well, keep going.

3, 5, 6, 6 (5)

Ashley and Ola

Samba

Love Is In The Air –  John Paul Young

ashley ola 3

Hip thrust of abs as Ola descends. Good wrap around. Bit too trotty. Gallopy and then thrust shaking astride. Bit slow and weak on turn around walk back. Spin around floor of Ola full body. Ends on embrace.

DB – Very nice maybe do up shirt wont be distracted.

LG – You coped well with a very difficult dance.

BT – Dreamboat from Brazil. You got your bit wrong at the corner. (Points to Ola)

CRH – Those hip  rolls were absolute filth and I loved it.

8, 8, 7, 8 (6)

James and Ola have a surprise celebration of their 10th wedding anniversary. Cake brought on by pal Brendan. Craig didn’t repay the favour and stick the cake in their face.

Artem and Natalie

Rumba

Love the way you lie – Eminem feat. Rihanna

natalie artem 3

Good romance on start into a swivel swing around of Gumede. Good mirroring. Leg through smooth but lift both feet to go through. Good ballet carousel let spin.

Smooth romance, without words needed.

LG – That. Was. Fab-u-lous. (Another one for the bingo card!)

BT – Beauty in perpetual motion.

CRH – Love. Love. Love.

DB – You speak with the whole of your body. Brilliant.

9, 9, 9, 9, (8)

Hilarious laugh after Artem mentions something. Did someone guff it?

Deborah and Robin

Quickstep

Higher and Higher – Jackie Wilson

deb robin 3

Good keeping in hold. Kept pace around circling. Enjoying whilst concentrating. Good hop along and turns. Decent level of bounce.  Gentlemanly end from dapper Robin.

BT – Dragon is turning into a butterfly. Light-footed than ever. So much better.

CRH – You put a smile on my face I really enjoyed that.

DB – It was fast and furious. Fix that frame. Fabulous.

LG – Your best to date, my lovely.

7, 7, 7, 7 (7)

Strictly Bingo!

Here’s ours so far. You can still play along with the original card if you wish – check last weeks post at this link – https://falsefabs.wordpress.com/2013/10/06/strictly-come-dancing-week-2-2/ . However, do not copy the concept. Play along and share with us here, contact by email above on the page tabs or tweet us @FalseFabs. 🙂

scd bingo copy

Who did well and who did not?

Natalie, Susanna, Fiona, Abbey and Patrick made impressive performances. Vanessa, Sophie, Mark and Rachel were not so good with structure all over the place conflicting the dance. The rest held stability and no stand out features.

Danger zone

Julien, Vanessa and Patrick.

Results to follow…

IMAGES

BBC

Strictly Come Dancing Week 2

Opening the show on the second live evening where last week’s votes are carried over to this week’s will see the first elimination on tomorrow (Sunday) night’s results show. Sadly, Brucie was given the night off after having the flu leaving Tess Daly to host with Claudia Winkleman in the auditorium. Tonight’s show was full of improvement, game raising and all things glitz. Read on…

tess claudia2

As ever back are the judges Craig Revel Horwood, Darcey Bussell, Len Goodman and Bruno Tonioli. Our professional score is also added in brackets alongside.

Susanna and Kevin

Tango

Locked Out of Heaven – Bruno Mars

susanna kevin 2

Good toes pointed to and kept on floor as dragged around floor. Almost fell wrong during sharp back tilt quickly caught by Kevin. Kevin’s re-work of Susanna hid any more possible misses and attempted to recover routine where Susanna hit back with strong finish and leg kicks despite mishap slightly off kiltering them overall. Sharp cover up, however did help, somewhat.

LG – I think you put the go in Tango. Crisp. Frame little bit loose. Loose connection sometimes. Two dances down, so far so fabulous.

BT – Fire, flare attack. Very important in Tango. You have so much attack frame goes a little bit. Add control to your spirit.

CRH – Full of drama nad intent. Rigid. Dance on a whole was very, very good.

DB – Loving your conviction. Left shoulder does lift and merk. So fab to watch you.

7, 8, 8, 8 (7)

Tony and Aliona

Charleston

It Don’t Mean A Thing (If Ain’t Got That Swing) – Duke Ellington and Irving Mills

tony aliona 2

Happy to be here Jacklin does the obvious golf set up clad in chequered clobber. Using a club to pair them completely ignoring the premise of show, then sees show off Aliona cartwheel her own way backward leaving Jacklin isolated. Terrible kicks from Jackin whilst constantly carrying partner around to have something to do. Someone get him the caddy. Absolutely rotten.

BT – I don’t know what it swung me but not in place I wanted it to go. [Homophobic Aliona not impressed with Bruno’s swing joke.] Timing off no swing lots of fishing. Wasn’t really a good Charleston was it.

Tess – Oh no, it’s Judge Dread,

CRH – Should be lively energetic, phonetic unfortunately yours was limp lame and lacklustre. Devoid of any real characterisation.

DB – Difference, confidence you hit each lift. Improvement from last week a godsend.

LG – At 69 to dance a very energetic dance I commend you for that. Very character driven. You’re a sportsman not an actor.

2, 4, 4, 3 (1)

Natalie and Artem

Waltz

If I Aint Got You – Alicia Keys

artem natalie 2

Mood, tone and graceful connection set ballroom scene beautifully. Good head tilts in turn. Careful footwork smooth. Felt light, breezy and clandestine.

CRH – I was moved, however some occasional gaping. Loved use of skirt. Breath-taking.

DB – You have the quality, the feeling. Beautiful stretch. One to watch.

LG – Loved feel of it. Grace and elegance. Absolutely corking.

BT – Incredible control and confidence for week 2. Fluidity of hands and arms, tell a story with each flicker of your wrist. Dance is a performing art.

8,9,8,9 (8)

Dave and Karen

American Smooth

How Do You Like Your Eggs in the Morning? by Dean Martin and Helen O’Connell

Dave Karen 2

Hairy Baker Dave did a kitchen come dancing set up complete with eggs background sound. Decent lift but felt very horizontal only for Karen. Waits for Karen after spins. Caveman Dave lifts Karen off chair for a lift after she scales it for him. Ends with a glitzy gold American Football helmet and no interest, style or presence and only ‘made it through’ a routine. Dull as dishwater, darling. May be the resident coast through, lovable rogue only. It’s a once in a lifetime experience. Go for it, or go home.

DB – Certainly tamed that excitement. Beautiful long arms but get bit paddly. Actually touch her. Shame you had to use a chair to get into that lift.

LG – Always handy to get a bunk up. Bit bumpy but landed safely and got through it. Appreciated those lovely heel leads. Fun to watch.

BT – Like a disaster movie. Cooking up a storm, you’re cooking up a stink. Got to listen to the music. Sense of musicality. I do appreciate the fun factor but still have to the feet down on the right bit at the right time.

TD – Craig, I hope it gets more than a two from you this week.

CRH – Dancing it by numbers. Lacked style but can build in. Lift a little bit lumberjackish but like Darcey, I do like you.

3, 5, 5, 4 (3)

Patrick and Anya

Tango

Beat It – Michael Jackson

patricj anya 2

Wind up key starts the couple off. Very strong first motion. Joins sharp attack with Anya in hold. Easy guiding along after but hold power of mood still. Decent work around. Powerful couple capable of much more. Showed mechanical skill and style no one else has yet delivered in difference. Patrick ends by freezing partner who awakened him in turn of tables.

LG – Hold could have been tighter. Danced with lot of verve and energy. You’ll be hanging around for weeks.

BT – Strong and gritty. Lost bit of frame.

CRH – Your bottom does stick out a little so tuck it under. Stepping off on ball instead of heel. Timing impeccable.

DB – Strong, masculine. Try use whole back as you change. One to watch.

6, 7, 7, 7 (7)

Deborah and Robin

Cha Cha

Respect – Aretha Franklin

deborah robin 2

Deb goads Dragon Craig between panel bar and dancefloor. Smiley attitude good fun. Little lost in hold into spin around by Rob. Not fully into arm work on flim flam sway arms from up to down motions.

BT – Like a tribute act. Love bubbly, feisty, frivolous personality. Still have to do much more hip action better place of feet.

CRH – Dragon verses drag queen darling, be careful. Great attitude but must straighten legs. Very stompy. Joy to watch.

DB – Loving your zest for performance. Great to watch somebody go for it. Your timing is good.

LG – Cheeky. For complete package got to work on technique.

[Len was supposed to start the comments roll, just to add. :p]

5, 7, 6, 6 (6)

Rachel and Pasha

Salsa

Get Lucky – Daft Punk

rachel pasha 2

Constant prop use could become distraction that becomes costly. In hold weak again. Struts along, Pasha follows on knees. Fair arm through entanglements. Easy fling backs as only interest. Lift (allowed) around leg spin over Pasha to finish with no impact. Forgettable.

CRH – Wriggling around like a slug in salt. Awkward.

DB – Didn’t get that time to it. Push. Bit wishy washy.

LG – Little bit careful again. Come out and really wow us. Good fun.

BT – Gorgeous rag doll. Worst thing of all is your balance. Concentrate, work on your strength ‘cos you’ve got the beauty.

4, 5, 6, 5 (5)

Vanessa and James

Waltz

Run to you – Whitney Houston

james vanessa 2

Hard concentration in eyes. Good back leg spin head tilt. Bit empty and safe led mostly by James as a guide into dance. Vanessa needs more of own presence, though not over animated incorporated.

DB – Emotion of romance. Soften the knees and you’ll get more glide to loosen up a bit.

LG – Poignant, romance, bit of a story. Gotta work bit more on the details. Small things to make it into a complete package.

BT – Deeply felt. Connected, involved. By doing so, moving better.

CRH – Definitely comfortable in hold. You’ve done a lovely job, James.

5, 6, 6, 6 (5)

Julien and Janette

Tango

Applause – Lady Gaga

julien janette 2

Showing strong command as lead. Good in hold, despite stance little wayward. Overall decent hold and guidance of partner. Working floor well. Interest of audience. Rises above Manrara. Was OK for week 2 starter. One of few males who has led during start of competition which is most difficult for all male celeb’s to do so. Most of the male celeb’s are still struggling with that.

LG – Tango is like a Cactus – sharp and spiteful. Bit of an orchid. Did with conviction. Good go.

BT – Didn’t know if I was watching a Tango or a Paso Doble.

CRH – Posture, I’m afraid, is ghastly. Not your best, darling.

Tess asks – “Better than last week?”

CRH – No

DB – Loved the attack, came out with conviction.

3, 5, 5, 5 (5)

Fiona and Anton

Cha Cha

Beggin’ – Frankie Valli and The Four Seasons

fiona anton 2

Good lone dance sass. In hold strong prominence from Fullerton. Enjoying the music and dance. Just concentrate on the move as going along with enthusiasm. Almost slipped back, supported by Anton. Working the legs. Very decent. Anton also stands accused of having a stiffy by eagle eyed viewers who thought he may have got one whilst other claim his partner was too. 😮

BT – No need to beg just need to dance darling. Do it right!

TD – Was it the nerves?

(Fiona agrees) – Yeah.

CRH – Thought you were very good till you kicked Anton in the shin. Nice couple, love watching you dance.

DB – Lose consistency. Very controlled. Lots of promise.

LG – Stuff on your own, right on time. There was the incident. Never recovered after that.

6, 6, 5, 5 (6)

Mark and Iveta

Salsa

Bom Bom Bom – Sam and the Womp

mark iveta 2

Channelling Austin Powers. Strong enthusiasm. Keeping character. And crowd. Good kick outs with Iveta spins. Good floor spin round of Iveta. Big boy doing well for dance strength but needed a tad more movement than confined to one spot. Work the floor on occasion.

CRH – Little bit disjointed for me. A crowd pleaser darling. Heavily due to character.

DB – Loved energy. Always take charge and fab performance.

LG – In the darkest clouds a ray of sunshine appears. A party dance, meant to be fun and entertaining. You make me feel good.

BT – Wasn’t a Salsa. But it was fun to watch.

4, 6, 7, 5 (5)

Sophie and Brendan

Charleston

Rock it for me – Chick Webb and Orchestra feat. Ella Fitzgerald

brendan sophie

Good start for Soph. Waxtor came to life. Arms, bounce, kicks sharp. Good somersault off Brendan backwards. Good mirroring of partner in front and behind. When you really try as a professional you can really focus without your attitude clouding routine, Brendan. Dance suits Sophie.

DB – Brilliant choreography Brendan.

LG – Great routine, beautifully danced.

BT – Stylistically perfect.

CRH – Brendan, you were rubbish. Sophie that was fit darling.

9, 9, 9, 9 (7)

Ben and Kristina

Waltz

What the world needs now – Dionne Warwick

Strictly Come Dancing

Strolls up heavily. Shaky steps on spin round collecting Kristina. Wait for second on floor before moving. Lost. Daydreaming not great for routine. Very slow and careful footing. Clueless again. Only hunk attitude may carry him along the competition. Only goes so far. No depth showing whatsoever.

LG – Look magnificent but you don’t move much. Lower through. Better than last week.

BT – Drive the music.

CRH – Rugby butt as delicious as it is, doesn’t protrude much. Inject more personality. Just smiling lit up then you looked terrified.

DB – Ballaclase did work. Little more connection between you.

6, 6, 7, 6 (4)

Abbey and Aljaz

Cha Cha

Let’s Get Loud – Jennifer Lopez

abbey alijaz

Strong musicality. Strong sways from Aljaz. Abbey slightly lagging behind. Morphed into a wooden Barbie doll. Good leg splits in middle downward. Extremely lost on spin, more a turn around.

BT – Plenty to fancy about Miss. Clancy. You do look fab, natural instinct for the dance. Careful with your freehand. Tiny little stumble at end?

CRH – Free arm very haphazard. Though whole thing very enjoyable.

DB – You can dance, just trust partner and relax when you come out of hold, do you lose that focus. Believe in yourself.

LG – Arms lose little bit of discipline. You’re a good dancer, Abbey.

7, 7, 8, 8 (6)

Ashley and Ola

American Smooth

Beyond the Sea – Bobby Darin

ashley ola 2

After the revelations of hunky new daddy for the second time audience DILF Ashley begins.

Very good spin around in hold collection before gliding crane jump off onto dancefloor. Good lift around of Ola (allowed) followed by second flat carousel on shoulders. Very commanding. Good sophistication in face. Arms good. End on back dip down lift atop arms.

CRH – Wrist is broken, so much content in there. Fantastic energy and lifts. Great showman.

DB – Whole thing incredible. One habit, dips. So impressive, you are gonna go far.

LG – You put the ooh in Smooth. Got the dry mouth. Each week be better than before, that’s what you’ve done.

BT – About showbiz Hollywood glamour. What American Smooth is all about.

7, 9, 8, 8 (8)

Danger Zone

At this point its pretty much anyone’s game with these few as weakest so far in terms of audience reception and favour. They are Tony, Patrick, Fiona, Julien, Mark and Rachel. However three who could face the voting pitfall are Tony, Julien and Patrick.

Online Votes

This year you can vote up to five times online so spread your votes out for a few of your faves. You have to open an account at BBC’s website though.

Strictly Bingo!

scd bingo 2 copy

You can visit us @FalseFabs on Twitter or copy the card here (above) and play along in our original take on False Fabs Strictly Bingo. Anyone else trying to copy and implement the same idea will just look completely irrelevant and lame and you know exactly where it came from. But do join in, play along and let us know how you get on if you wish! Here’s ours below!

Upon this the BBC have added a sweepstakes for you too. Not the same and allowed, however, seeing as SCD is their product, after all.

Copyright notice: In no way, shape or form are you allowed to pass off the card as your own.

Our card so far! Quite a few daubs.

Our card so far! Quite a few daubs.

Lifts

Salsa, Argentine Tango, American Smooth, Charleston and Freestyle, are dances that allow a lift.

iPlayer is NoPlayer

Fans headed home from all nighters and late night workers without an on demand catch up TV service were appalled and annoyed that the website on the BBC had not uploaded the full show. Even at 1am the show was not uploaded yet feature numerous clips of the evening already put on questioning bad management at the Beeb once again failing to give viewers what they pay for and desire. Rival show X Factor began running its near two hour borefest on national television again yet the BBC lacked any Strictly catch up service, which is exactly what iPlayer is meant to provide. Fans believe the BBC to be dysfunctional in its quality to consumer need, of which is funded by the licence fee of Public Service Broadcasting. The results show with the first vote off is tomorrow evening at 19.20pm on BBC One.

FalseFabs inquired after viewer complaints. The show was uploaded onto BBC iPlayer at 1.54am.

Results to follow…

IMAGES

BBC

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