X Factor UK 2012 The Final: Part Two

X Factor UK 2012

The Final: Part Two

xf 12 nicole jahmene james final

X Factor finalists perform one last time. X Factor shunted Christopher Maloney from it’s stage and wasn’t in the show after they gave him one line to sing. Maloney, who won all shows until week eight of ten, came third in the final.

Union J started dismally. Carolynne Poole, bit off. Melanie Masson a cracker once again. Yeahhhhhhhhhh! Jade provided good musky tone. Ella produced sound but no one was shown. Kye Sones and two babes. District3 terrible. Union J again. Overkill. Ella warble. Rylan party theatrics in a sleigh and catastrophic sound with sparkly fur coat. No singing whatsoever. Backing singers strong. Other acts mime along, as does headbobbing Tulisa. District3 and Union J back again. Then girls and Rylan and Kye. Ella ending off. James and Jahmene enter and end with traditional scream.

Please no more.

Rio Ferdinand alert. Oh dear.

Songs of the series (which weren’t many) were going to be the starting premise for the show.

Jahmene Douglas

Angels – Robbie Williams

jahmene angel 12

Acapella with elevated box staging. All linger and easy talking through song. Rather timid performance once more. Still extremely fragile. Lingering yell once more, that distorts melodic composition. Still all over the place, hasn’t found placement of tone, and all a show off nothing song.

Louis said of Douglas “Jahmene you’re in the final. You’re a fantastic role model. You move me because you got so much soul. You’re an incredible role model. Please vote for Jahmene I want him to win.”

Tulisa supported with praise “Outtuve all the songs, I’m happy you chose that one. One of my fav’rots from you. Congardulations.”

 Gary think it’s been quite tough. Been in too comps battling with past and fighting for your future. Dignity and grace. Another stunning night for you.

Once again teary Nicole said of her baby “I gotta keep it together. You bring spirit and hope to this show I feel safe. Greatest love of all. Your my greatest role model. Like a beacon of light.”

Dermot asked Louis why he praised someone out of his category for once. Louis added once again “I want him to win.”

Dermot’s lame joke telling us we can keep Scherzinger from Barack Obama for Louis Walsh and cash was plain daft. Britain doesn’t want either kept.

James Arthur

Let’s Get It on – Marvin Gaye

james arthur nicole romance 12

More of a dubstep bass theme ruined it instantly. His vocals was instantly too off from the style of aiming to be a grimy star, then shifting his sound back to his ‘self’ vocal that he has usually sang in over the weeks prior. Schmoozing Tulisa with a kiss making his way to the stage, take pauses in between seemingly lost and filling time with lack of confidence  Still needs to climb massive mountain in that respect. Ended with a bevvy of beauties surrounding him. Was bit simple and safe.

Louis – Ready-made artist. Original, honest. Nicole you’ve been best mentor ever in final.

Tulisa – “I know I’ve said it a million times over the live shows that you’re an artist, you take songs and make them your own. Feel like were at James Arthur concert. You take untouchable classics and make them your own. You are an artist James Arthur.”

Gary “You’ll go off and get developed. You don’t need that you’re ready. Ready to download your album right away.”

Nicole – “I’m humbled and feel so blessed to work with you.”

Dermy tells us of two competitions going on, and informs the public of the shady behaviour of the ego manic panel of judges aiming to secure a win over the course of the show, then highlighting Nicole’s two acts in final success. We then saw a clip of the journey from the “Mighty Mentors.”

No we are treated to the civil servant auditionee who clearly saw the future before us all. “It was that f***ing Tu-liss-ia” Give that man an OBE!

Louis got two lapdances from Robbie (Williams) and Lorna Bliss, the Britney double, remebered by c’est moi on BBC show The one and only.

Gary and Tulisa’s explosive nature to the minor comments. Nicole’s dictation of unscribeable words formed in her alien language.

X Factor chose to flaunt its dwindling reputation once more with Leona Lewis returning from the ghost archive, likeable loser Olly Murs, short of the top boyband JLS and the first winners as a group thanks to in house bullying lies Little Mix. Mini Cheryl Cole Cher Lloyd even featured. The winners Joe McElderry and Matt Cardle were invisible to all of mankind. They do NOT exist.

Here they come….

One Direction

Kiss You

 one direction xf final 12

The spritely boys started with an Atari themed computer game. Zayn Malik’s start had an audio problem, his mic wasn’t on. Whoops! Again? But, but, sound came out of the stereo when his mic was off.

It was rather weak and lazy and the sound when going live for a portion of song was not continually working. Either that or they simply can’t sing. Miming galore, the boys then ran into the audience like maniacs. Liam check his earpiece and then they all rush back to the stage. Okay, then… Yo –yoing back and forth clueless and mic probs, it was then ‘Game Over.’ Goodness… That was tough.

dave cam xfactor

Hypocritical Prime Minister David Cameron gets in on the act, mentioning “Jahmazing” to spawner Nicole.

If it wasn’t bad enough, David Cameron got in on the act. Turning on the Crimbo lights with the kiddies around for the charity Together with short lives.

Chancellor won’t take the VAT off the single. Let’s all praise George and Dave.

Emeli Sande

Clowns

em sande xf final

A perfect piano position with pitch perfection sound. Sande looked a glamourous, gorgeous superstar among the violet lava lamp TV screen. It was a powerful, sweet and charismatic outing with mass star appeal. Sheer perfection.

The winner‘s singles performed, which were recorded months ago, are up next.

rio ferdinand audience fottoie final xf

The local soccer stars were in the arena as Manchester City and Manchester United squads were shown. Quizzed about Rylan and James, Rio Ferdinand and the other footie stars were thanked for being INVITED. They also chose to show up. Which one is with WAG Tulisa?

Jahmene Douglas

Let It Be

JAHMANE FINAL

That’s right, the outdated, slow classic that should not be given an overhaul would be Jahmene’s winner’s single if he wins tonight. Just when you thought the hysteria around the show couldn’t be any more stereotypical, cheap or tedious, X Factor pulls it right out of the bag. This is just one of many reasons viewers are fed up with.

Filled with a gospel choir backing him up and screeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeches of outburst to a musical composition of 88 keys and tender moments destroyed with overkill of yells and thumping bass in the wrong places with an intolerable sound was outlandish.

Repetitive Louis began “What more can I say? You’ve got so much soul, and passion. People at home I wanna change this guy’s life. I want him to win the X Factor, please vote!” Walsh yells in another attempt to rally votes.

Tulisa was pleased. “I am so happy you’re in final. Couldn’t be two better people in the final. Sang your little heart out. Deserve to be here.”

Gary said “Really simple actually. You have an unbelievable voice and talent. All you gotta do is sing the song and make people feel something.”

Nicole ended “Thank you so much for that honest beautiful performance most relaxed you’ve ever been. That was a jahmazing shamoment. You’re greatest blessing in this show for me.”

James Arthur

Impossible

JAMES ARTHUR IMPOSSIBLE

James sang without his guitar; however is playing guitar in his record. Absolutely laughable. In order to protect his image of constant guitar, it features highly in his performance. Terrible production. As for the sound, was a lot of bass and vocals felt off with the kick in, seeming lost at points. Still isn’t fully ready in the limelight. Needs careful handling. Though playing safe and easy won’t sell records. After a slow and vocal rendition, the shouting came at extreme volume, which destroyed the whole atmosphere of the song and its drive. Backing track with the guitar outdid Arthur on stage. Was all over the place.

Louis “you’re both winners with me.”

Mundane Tulisa spoke “I know you gunna understand what I say when I say this. From moment I saw you, I got you. I get you. We’re the same people. You know wot I mean? And you have been to the depths in life. The deep dark depths, you came back out and you came back out. You are an inspirer. People this is your last chance to pick up, and vote, for James, Arthur!”

Gary offered realism “You came to this competition as an artist. Proud on stage tonight. You know best.”

Cliché to the stars Nicole said “You’ve proven anything is possible. Hunny, your life is never gunna be the same after this.”

Arthur needs a lot of fine tweaking, the sort that X Factor chiefs wanted but couldn’t figure out how to do because it was biased in how to approach.

Rihanna

Stay/We Found Love feat. Calvin Harris

rihanna xf final 12 white

She’s back. All of them were. Rihanna always has star appeal, however this was a rather meek outing per se. A ballad which was a tad cheap, easy and half hearted, still sang well, but didn’t fully enthuse people as it should have. It was all very ‘nice’ wasn’t it? Good for her. Her attire was classy and striking of a white laced Egyptian goddess. She then got the crowd going with her dance hit We Found Love.

rihanna xf final 12 sparks

With just over thirty minutes left to crown the winner, we now hope Louis Walsh can figure out how to bring the vote to deadlock again.

Winning result

cd factory

While the manufactured production line of production “hot off the press” CD’s (bit old now, those things) of the winner’s single not available anymore, and no sight of washed up TV presenters shamelessly telling us to buy it by holding up the album artwork of one word in black boring font and one picture of artist just standing there doing nothing exciting, the result loomed.

The winner is…

Silence beckons. Tension mounts. Suspense continues.

James Arthur!

james arthur tats

Matt Cardle version two was crowned. James Arthur has won the show. Nicole was ecstatic. Once again, it was all about her in James bask of glory. Overcoming hardship, the ugly duckling into sweet swan song story delivered us a new duckie for the future to rinse our water of the back of. It was set in stone from the beginning shows. This is what X Factor wanted, as did Mr. Cowell.

matt cardle blue mic

Singing sensation, Matt Cardle

We arn’t without praise for James, but we keep reality real. He will struggle if not careful thought out. At this time, and on X Factor performances, he was still abundant in showing his true potential. All safe and no qualities of interest outside of a few “off the hype” singles could cost overall reputation. Steve Brokestein, sorry Brookstein, is written among James’ stars if handle wrongly. After the first few singles, fans will want to be defiant now, as always, though after the bubble bursts, no one has thought on how to preserve their longevity.

Well done James, you weren’t the worst star on the show, but not the best on performance and heightened sympathy to derail the real winner, Christopher Maloney.

We’ll have one last X Factor post coming next week. It will be the one Simon Cowell should read. It’s how to sort this whole mess out. You really should take a meeting in London over January 2013. What do you have to lose? 5- 10 mins or millions of viewers? This isn’t an ego trip, but, who was the only person to see James Vs Ella coming?

All profits from the single will go to the charity for children, Together with Short Lives.

james arthur win all on stage 12

All the acts then showered James on stage with adoration for his victory. Not exactly Leona Lewis, but, congrats! People just couldn’t bear the sympathy and hypocrisy stories this year.

Thank god it’s over, for now. It was the toughest watch possible.

X Factor UK 2012: Week 8

X Factor UK 2012:

Week 8

 

This week’s theme is to ruin classics from ABBA and Motown

as acts sing two songs each.

Rylan Clark

Mamma Mia – ABBA

Alice in Wonderland meets the asylum.

Louis claimed Rylan was “not a joke act. Brilliant song choice Nicole. Your people’s champion” in another dig at Christopher Maloney.

Tulisa spoke “Loved staging. Well deserved. My kind of cheese. Love you Rylan.”

Gary –  “officially declare check mate. Respect you for getting to week 8. Their choice whose here” speaking of the public.

Nicole – “that’s the way how you open the show. Looking so fine. Sung amazing, so proud of you.”

Well done for X Factor allowing Women bishops into society on the chess board.

Union J

The Winner Takes It All

Stereotype song. Still won’t learn selecting song that is over their assumption is a mistake. Tulisa most inconsistent judge forever if ever there was one follows.

Simple.

GB – best of luck to you think you’re on a roll.

NS – that’s what your future looks like up on stage. Courageous and strong and Josh such ease.

Ease = lazy.

LW – everybody sings. Please vote, as Louis ASKED for votes live on air as he has done years on end. It breaks certain ruling and code in media law.

Sob story Jahmene’s was ramped up to scale 10, this time with his mum involved to gain votes.

X Factor’s sympathy propaganda abusing regulations struck again.

“Child survivor of the year award” which had NO relevance on the show was presented to Jahmene and not one piece of singing aspiration was mentioned. Should a person who needs a singing show who hasn’t fully sung to win just because he is lost in life and needs confidence? Because no one else in the world has a hard life?

Jahmene Douglas

I have a dream

X Factor stooped to a new all-time low with the bulls**t ometer.

Breathy, no vocal singing. Just airy talk through words, with one blaring pitchy noise on big notes, still cannot sing a whole or even part of song, just noise.

Could not have been more boring.

LW – don’t think really suited you. Incredible role model. (didn’t he just say that to Rylan?) On a podium, like lewis Hamilton, Nicole he laughed. Well, she likes a Lewis lookalike, doesn’t she? Though not that Louis anymore, perhaps?

Wot a beautiful, beautiful performance repetitive Tulisa adds. “ I said it last week and I’ll say it again, running outta ways to kiss your butt, strongest voice in competition.”

GB – another great performance. Slightly rushed ablibs. Well done.

NS – don’t think it was a great performance, it was the performance, the American adds, to no reaction of her Americanised audience playing.

James Arthur

SOS

There’s James Arthur, with his guitar, again.

Busker esq. Uninteresting and just standard. Hard to see albums sold should he wins at this rate of downplay. Has the wrong mentor. Has been shelved by about twelve professional years’ worth. It’s a shame, had the most potential of the top two.

LW – travesty without you in show. TC – that is what is so amazing bout you, take a classic to point I barely recognise it. (That’s called uninteresting.) I want either you or Jahmene to win competition. Propaganda.

NS – make that song better.

Christopher Maloney

Fernando

Another classic look and a sound of a star.

In middle of dancers flapping to make him seem ignored, smothered or forgotten. Diversion tactic.

Very good change in the vocals. Maloney has improved drastically. Charismatic, tender.

NS – lovely theatrical piece, very good vocals, (pause.) Little bit of a snoozer, can’t knock you for working very hard,

Contradiction.

LW – Abba the musical. All the guys around you with tops on. Walsh strongly implies trying to cast insinuations to Maloney’s sexuality which is high level victimisation.

This, of course comes from Walsh, who has never had a mention of his romantic liaisons, never had a female in the press or linked to any in sight, and has been involved in homosexual scandals in the past.

TC – in underwear, staging creepy, stop myself giggling,. Vocally very good.

GB – sorry bout comments should be focusing on vocals of yours. Very good.

Rylan Clark

Baby Love / Stop! In the name of Love / You Keep Me Hangin’ On – The Supremes

OMG, like, look at feet, not so well gel!

Another clouded confusion of songs ruing the essence that once was The Supremes. How could you Nicole? You should be ashamed.

Union J

I’ll be there – Jackson Five

Look kids, they’re all wearing the same clothes! Plaid or what!

Typical Louis boyband slecetion of the teeny bopper Jackson Five for a teeny bopper bundle of cuties to look sweet on stage.

What about the singing? They wasn’t any. All minimal, all this spikey haired ruiner of the band, apparently he’s called Josh, destroying song from front of house aiming to be the star of the group, neglecting that “the gay one” can actually sing the best. The one on the end, and the other bookmark on the left, couldn’t have less direction if they tried.

James Arthur

Let’s Get It On – Marvin Gaye

Yearning to Scherzinger for guidance.

A classic from Marv, James tackled it with grace, well placed once he rebuked his trademark guitar and sang a bit of soul the judges have been harping on about for weeks. Only now he gets a soul number. It was a fair vocal with a not so engaging stage presence and lacked anything near Marvin’s classic. Note the word is classic. You should consider not attempting a classic, because, you will never compete with that, and look ever inferior. It can harm your reputation.

After Louis stated best vocal performance of the night, James’ ego is highly going through the roof believing he is better than the rest.

Jahmene Douglas

The tracks of my tears – The Miracles

Ella was voted off because she was boring. James was in trouble because he was, boring. Jahmene is boring.

The vocals were as we continually repeat, which should ring volumes to X Factor, the process isn’t working, and Jahmene, who needs to “win” for personal development to feel like a human in a mass sympathy vote, who would also then be ruined by the business, is a massive sigh of tedious exhaustion.

Christopher Maloney

Dancing on the Ceiling – Lionel Richie

Got the party groove going upbeat and another good vocal performance.

An upbeat motown number instead of all the boring, mundane tracks before him from the rest in the competition, Maloney entered yet another good vocal performance. The vocals were sharp, crisp and fitted the tone of the song, which is ever essential. Remember when everyone used to say song choice comments, notice how, none have mentioned these when their acts can’t do well in that critique of commentary. That should tell you enough of the competition, surely?

ABBA should gain a knighthood for the musical donations to this country only to be obliterated. They’re probably chuckling round their fires with a cuppa! Motown was also a chance to shine for all acts and X Factor producers had hoped James and Jahamene would topple Christopher as feeling they had more soul. Truth be told the double J’s failed to deliver to their fullest potential, begging the question, are they all out of steam now? With boring performances and no real outlook even should they have a record deal. With a “poor man’s Professor Green and Edwin Munch’s famous painting screaming to no sustainable effect, what more can they actually offer in spite of Maloney actually looking, sounding, and receiving praise for his vocals, on a singing competition, as a star? If X Factor were clever they would realise if Maloney is polling most votes, Cowell would be “quids in” either way.

Cowell has never really cared about the show reputation, has he? This year the act will not be chasing the Christmas number one single race as in previous years, after Rage Against the Machine toppled previously disallowed to be mentioned victor Joe McElderry, who has also signed to another label akin to Matt Cardle. Cowell is said to have been championing a boy (James or Jahmene) from the start, and plans to make Scherzinger head judge after intending to dump her initially. Many feel this is why she was given the strongest category and fixed to make “X Factor history” as first judge with all three acts in the quarter finals.