Film Review: Magic Mike XXL

Magic Mike XXL (2015)

Channing Tatum, Matt Bomer, Joe Maganiello,

Adam Rodriguez, Kevin Nash

Director: Gregory Jacobs

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Sweaty, hot, hunk studs are all the rage these days. After the original frolic of oiled up, lubricated pleasure and Channing Tatum’s irrepressible smile, filled with inane pearly white gnashers, the brazen slutfest come strip joy was bestowed onto audience once again. This time, filled with hip-hop stripping, Hollywood’s highest earner Channing Tatum returned in it’s lacklustre sequel, relying heavily on overindulgent female and neglected realities of men. Those who work as strippers, those who like them and those who might want tips to please their women were overlooked.

Instead, the self indulgent overpraise of Channing Tatum’s incessantly annoying square jawed gawk and forced love of self workout regime in a hunky body show off was on offer.

Bland blokes with no t-shirts.

Bland blokes with no t-shirts.

96% of female audiences stormed the Box Office to witness Channing and his troupe take of their clothes in what was an abysmal show of muscle clad, empty expressions on Tatum’s chiselled hipster white boy gaze.

The film’s estimates were hugely lower than expected, earning a pitiful $12 million at the weekend and $27.1 Wednesday to Sunday, last week. The original, in 2012, drew in $39m.

The self-belief of Tatum’s acting and directing of the film could not be more inane, thinking the actor himself would be able to command gay audiences, assumed to like it, regardless, among the stereotype of lots of hunky men taking clothes off because women will cheaply come rushing in their thousands, as predicted to see a run down sex style topless pageant. They did. Though the gays didn’t. They would not be played into a level of idiotic, female framed, rubbish that consisted of letting bodies talk for themselves. The shameful technique could not even appeal Matt Bomer to secure their parting cash.

Tacky tactics, loose ideals and slutty attitudes to sell a film have slapped Tatum and his crew firmly in the face. A wake up call is needed. Not as great as Tatum clearly thinks of himself, just because Hollywood keeps him on the books, makes the show even more loosely idiotic with its non-existent plot.

Tatum’s stripper slutfest could not pass The Terminator and was outdone by Inside Out and the new and epic cinematic masterpiece, Jurassic World.

A few blokes in jeans and sneakers with extra few outfits now and then making a poor show of the Village People made everyone of them devoid of any emotion, captivation and desire.

Tatum needs to lose the vanilla gangsta look and stop larking around in a hip-hop sex fest for fun and hope it does well. It was cheap, sad and did not on any level suggest anything worthwhile.

Oh, and Alex Pettyfer isn’t in this one. Tatum was so jealous of Pettyfer’s limelight making the first a success that Tatum wanted to show off his vanity to be its main star. It flopped. Matthew McConnaheuy is also out. (Of the film.)

End result? Embarrassing waste of time. Don’t bother and spend two hours on a better film instead. Plain, boring and mundane.

Good ol’ Channing likes to just hope for the best, coin it in, rip people off, assume an audience and expect praise because he loves his own abs and maybe everyone else should. Ever an overrated blurb of inconsistency in Hollywood if ever there was one. Let’s get some new, mature and wider actors who don’t just take up the easy, free for all options.

Jupiter Ascending, which was Tatum’s attempt at a space drama with budget actors for a bit of fun in the genre because he likes it, went so well, right?

Leaving a shameful distaste in the self, without any negativity to prudishness of audiences prove a monumental problem for the film and its already announced third instalment. This time he wants fans to write it and it’s clear to see why. Tatum’s writing, ideas and directive stance while clogging up the main stage made the film as cheap as it comes, while making his background troupe forgettable. This film was built on encouraging the stamping of that out and influencing the lovers of the first flick, which has been missed, vividly.

There were simply actors walking through the movie, lacking choregoraphy, not sex appeal and a bundle of bodies with no tee shirts or personalities, where fans did not feel they received their financial worth. It was meant to be comedy based, Tatum revealed, yet not even any laughter could give it a free-pass clause.

There’s some inclusion of a few chicks now, with Amber Heard, Andie MacDowell, and Jada Pinkett Smith. All three’s involvement is plainly ridiculous and has no drive. All three are great actors, but this really did them no favours. Stick to Gotham, Fish. That really works for you. Not even the MILF vote for the mature woman could add any maturity to the already flawed childishness of the entire production.

In essence, MMXXL is just another film. One with no noticeability, humour or passion. It is simply an afterthought, of which you and this reviewer has already spent way too much time on.

Pants!

Film rating

1/5

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Film Review: X:Men: Days of Future Past (2014)

Film Review: X:Men: Days of Future Past (2014)

James McAvoy, Michael Fassbender, Jennifer Lawrence, Hugh Jackman, Nicholas Hoult,

Peter Dinklage, Patrick Stewart, Ian McKellen,

Director: Bryan Singer

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X-Men always seem to get their castings correct with new age or up and coming actors in the parts alongside the more esteemed actors. This in itself creates a perfect balance of the connection in film. Marvel adore the fact the X-Men resembles human interactions to the comic book heroes. These decisions further enhance that imperative.

Old favourites are back including Storm, Raven and the Iceman in the future as well as the past to tell the tale further from the young and old Professor X and Magneto.

Under the distinct leadership of director Bryan Singer, the X:Men series has developed considerably well. Leading on from X:Men First Class, the second in the backlog of the X:Men’s history blends past and future together. Following the new favourites with the younger Magneto, Professor X and Beast, they are tasked to guide and protect Mystique. Whilst the younger story leads, Wolverine crosses over with both time frames as the go-between.

Michael Fassbender’s smoothness, Lawrence’s emotional drive and the partnerships with Xavier in past and future are tenderly connected. Jackman’s reliance in previous X:Men stories is not overly emphasised through clever tweaking of the rest of the other characters making him a joy to watch.

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Singer’s story transports us, literally, to 1970’s America with a smooth and carefully laid out presentation. Adding the new threat of iron clad mutant destroyers known as Sentinels, the government against mutant story continues constructively. He manages to keep the binding ties of time travel apparent than most director’s forget when in charge of a big budget movie to wreak havoc.

The cinematography on display is exceptional, with a dark and impressive opener showing not all X:Men are invincible. The story will keep you guessing further along with interest. However, the story is the sequel of the new age X:Men and was clearly never going to be as amazing as its predecessor. Though what Singer realises is that this instalment can be just as good as. The rest of the cast realise this and have played their parts well.

This will surely lead on to the next part which opens a bigger range of mutants, skills, battles and story. With the younger teams developing the backstory of the present with the older heroes this film franchise has a comfortable future.

The film has taken its place from comic book genre and transformed onto the screen with a level of human interest in its own right as a serious blockbuster series.

For X:Men lovers this is a must see for piecing together the collective story. For those not into Sci:Fi this is still worth a look but may not be a full interest and could drive boredom early.

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Could also take a possible role?

Hollywood have already rumoured and confirmed that Channing Tatum will play the role of Gambit in a coming movie. Though I am unsure if Tatum is an accurate fit for the job despite being Hollywood’s number one gross box office draw, the third will undoubtedly cast more characters. Ian Somerhalder and Matt Bomer would be better choices and perhaps they can be the new Cyclops, though James Marsden gets a hard ride. We always thought he did a pretty decent job. Maybe they could be the younger versions in the forthcoming Apocalypse movie. I could only wish to be on the team to add some guidance and who to boost up there, but Hollywood seems to have their own understandings. Singer has proved outstanding in these films, but the third is always the most difficult to encourage. Once the thrill is there, the film can often fail to deliver among the hype. There aren’t any signs of this for X:Men as of yet, and we hope not, but let’s hope no complacency creeps its way forward.

We give it a well earned four star rating.

4stars

 

 

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