Strictly Come Dancing 2014, Week 10 Results

Strictly Come Dancing 2014, Week 10 Results

tess claudia 10

The group dance with a bundle of extras was confusing yet had good symmetry moments with a well danced Irish Jig. That blonde dude could get a job on Strictly next year maybe? Oh it was the cast of Lord of the Dance, Tess tells us.

Tess and Claudia return tonight with the results.

Making it through to the Quarter Finals next week is, in no particular order, – Simon and Kristina. Also through are – Caroline and Pasha.

The first couple to face the dance off later is – Mark and Karen.

 

Andre Rieu and the Johan Strauss Orchestra with Alfie Boe

 

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alfie boe

Foretelling a magical tale with pure sound and beautiful voice, all involved made this joining of two classic legends outstanding. Amazing talents.

 

Len’s Lens

Claudia’s stunning legs in a short dress looked great for her, have to say. Simon’s footwork was under Len’s guidance. Darcey talked about Pixie’s ballet moves. Craig’s score of 5 for Jake was under scrutiny. Claudia pointed out that “somebody bumped into him” but Craig defended the need for floor maintenance. The extra dancers received criticism as Claudia noted and asked Len if this was a valid choice. Len defended the decision. Bruno discussed Caroline’s Charleston. Craig was tempted to give a ten but defended his reasons why it was a little short. Bruno was then seen suggestively pouted a Tulip around his mouth and face towards Len.

The swing a-thon in a group Waltz is back next week too.

The results are back in with Tess now. Back again, still in no particular order, are – Pixie and Trent and Frankie and Kevin.

The second couple in the bottom two is – Sunetra and Brendan leaving Jake and Janette to dance again next week.

The dance off

 

Sunetra and Brendan

Rumba

Girl from Ipanema – Michael Bolton

scd 14 sunetra 10

Much more relaxed second time around and more graceful than before. When pressure is on, improves much more than usual. Probably not enough to save considering ‘fancy me favourite’ taking off clothes Mark. She should stay after better dance off.

Mark and Karen

Salsa

Viva Las Vegas – Elvis Presley

scd 14 mark 10

Mark’s lack of charisma continues to show no ethusiasm or pace. Timid, limp and relying on sad moments of stripping his shirt off. Wiggles hips again to save self. For a so called hunk, the only thing Mark seems to have is ‘flabs’ not abs. Terrible footwork and arm moves. Standing on spot dancing shows no attempt to dance at all.

 

The Judges Vote

Launch Show

The judges vote to save. In the event of a tie, leading judge Len has the casting vote.

Craig – Stood out was Mark and Karen.

Darcey – Save is Mark and Karen.

Bruno – Mark and Karen.

Len – Did agree. Mark and Karen.

Doctor Toe-No-ed!

sunetra brendan

Sunetra thanked her time on the show to the fans.

Thank you to all the viewers who got me to week ten.

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Strictly Come Dancing 2014, Week 10: Around the World

Strictly Come Dancing 2014, Week 10: Around the World

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This week’s Strictly special is an around the world theme. ?! Back are the judges Craig Revel-Horwood, Darcey Bussell, Len Goodman and Bruno Tonioli. Our score is also in brackets, giving clarity than stupid overmarking. Hosts Tess Daly and Claudia Winkleman are back to present.

What is with the extras?! Strictly have added four extra dancers on the floor with every dance couple. Why? If you wanted them then why didn’t you hire them to begin with. They take away from the couple and the show as a two people dance. Idiotic.

 

Pixie and Trent

Viennese Waltz

Tulips from Amsterdam – Max Bygraves

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Our first destination is The Netherlands. Dancing around windmills with clogs and long white robes, Pixie and Trent set us off to travel. Trent dances in arms with the other male dancing extras and follows twirling Pixie, handing out Tulips. This took away from the dance. In hold was decent with good rotations. Footwork clean but tad awkward at times minorly. Smooth gliding along. Too much of Pixie on own, breaking what a Viennese Waltz is, surely? Spins Trent to the floor instead of Pixie who is supposed to be on the floor. Might be different, but did not work as bet intended. Stupid. Pixie still playing very safe and not going the distance.

The judges’ comments are not being looked at this week, because they are still talking a load of biased rubbish.

9, 9, 10, 10 (8)

 

 

 

Mark and Karen

Salsa

Viva Las Vegas – Elvis Presley

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Time to fill the slots. Mark jumps off the judges stage and instantly turns around wiggling his bum. Stands with hands on hips as Karen is turned around. Weak arm moves as a female extra suggestively rips open Mark’s shirt from behind. If all else fails get out your tits aye BBC? Mark then gyrates on the floor in his knees to Karen. No enthusiasm or energy in hand shakes. Tired and lost in turns on floor when lifting Karen. All teeth and no substance. Limp and lacking.

Bruno up talked Mark’s “pelvic thrusts” in yet another perversion critique.

Interesting how all the BBC rely on is Mark’s body, yet for a ‘hunk’ he has no definition and his body is average. Like two aspirin on an ironing board. The BBC’s attitude to sex is second to none, it would seem.

7, 8, 9, 8 (7)

 

 

Sunetra and Brendan

Rumba

Girl from Ipanema – Michael Bolton

scd 14 sunetra 10

Off to Brazil now. Sunetra romances two extra male dancers as Brendan stands behind. This was stupid. Sunetra then joins Brendan and slowly moves around him as Brendan steers her into the other guys. Back with Brendan Sunetra let’s herself go a tad with a sultry back glide down. Decent movement around floor with arms and slow sexy walk. End with Brendan watching from afar. Good try from Sunetra but still holding back and way too timid. Needs to really let go and forget who is watching and just go for it. Lose the inhibitions.

5, 7, 8, 7 (7)

 

 

 

Caroline and Pasha

Charleston

Istanbul – They Might Be Giants

scd 14 caroline 10

Caroline begins on spot very well with legs and arms though bit too long. Pasha then joins behind steading her. Good flip over lift with kick outs above shoulders. Good leg in/outs with timing. Pasha flung down into a rowing boat of the extra dancers for no reason. Ends with Caroline lifted above all extras and then crowd surfed back to Pasha flipping over to end on amazing spectacle of lift. Still lacking full oomph though.

9, 10, 10, 10 (9)

 

 

Simon and Kristina

Waltz

Edelweiss – The Sound of Music OST

scd 14 simon 10

In Austria now. Tender start to the floor. Smooth steps in starting whirl around. Good footwork. Good interaction between two. Finally went outside of box ticking and made a near perfect dance. Very good show tonight. Only frustration is people like him only do this at the most crucial stage of the competition where they may be eliminated so close to the top.

9, 10, 10, 9 (9)

 

 

 

Frankie and Kevin

Jive

Surfin’ USA – The Beach Boys

scd 14 kevin 10

Lowered onto the floor from a surfboard Hawaiian shirt Kevin show off his legs with Frankie. Strong but slightly cluttered leg arounds in fast pace a struggle for Frankie to keep up. Good feel, but still little limp. Frankie has the look and the legs, but again holding back as all a little too sweet than pushing with full oomph. Taking it very easy. Got the kicks and flicks ticked off.

9, 9, 9, 9 (9)

 

 

 

 

Jake and Janette

Argentine Tango

Zorba the Greek

scd 14 jake 10

Greek Taverna plate smashing now. Jake starts mood with good clap solo with strong footwork. Good dip down of Janette. Set theme instantly. Good lifts and elevation on Janette above knees. Excellent flip over between legs in hold. Strong gauchos. Extras join. Accidental bump into extras. Finishes strong with plate smash. Proof extra dancers should not have been there.

Craig commented on the dance clashes. It was only one. Not that we excuse it either.

5, 8, 8, 8 (8) (Wasn’t that low.)

 

The vote is now crucial as the six couples will go to next week’s quarter finals.

 

The BBC don’t seem to respond well to criticism. Taking pot shots and bitter jibes were simply pathetic. The BBC allow it to happen. The BBC should stop being pety. It’s not like any of us have allowed systemic abuse to allow sexual predators including a paedophile to abuse thousands of people from their BBC dressing room, is it? Be mature. The best way to silence a critic is to appeal to them not pic on them with sad jibes that mean nothing. It continues to prove the BBC is full of abuse. They need to sack Louise Rainbow and her bullying team that encourage such behaviour, especially on a family show. Oh, and if you would like to take pot shots, missy, here’s one for you. How many failed programmes are attached to your name? One and Only, The Farm and others that have all been cancelled, especially not even getting a second series, if you would like to spout vitriol. How very professional of you. A complete failure at all reality TV programming. Good job!

 

 

Best dance of the night?

Simon and Kristina

Danger zone?

Sunetra, Jake and Frankie

 

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Strictly Come Dancing 2014, Week 9: Results

Strictly Come Dancing 2014, Week 9 Results

scd 14 9 tess claudia

Opening up with a professional group dance, Strictly themed a cops and robbers group dance featuring same sex dances for a brief few seconds. The girls dance with the gals and the boys danced with the bois. The BBC are scared of offending so watered it down to test out the idea.

Back are the hosts Tess Daly and Claudia Winkleman.

The results are in. The first couple back in no particular order is – Jake and Janette. Also through are – Pixie and Trent and Simon and Kristina. The first pair in the dance off are – Sunetra and Brendan.

Barry Manilow

Copacabana

barry manilow copa

Music legend and esteemed performer Barry Manilow treats us with two amazing songs with a full on classic conga loving limbo check Copa! Barry even pulled an audience member up for a little dance. Smooth.

Len’s Lens

Claudia brought back the lively chat with the extra look of the lens. Jake’s twerking hips and Macarena moves were looked at more. Len defended giving a 10 for that dance. Darcey was caught twerking behind the judges desk. Then she discussed her critique of Frankie’s feet. Craig was asked about Simon’s armography. Bruno talked about Caroline’s mishap slipping on her dress early on and recovering like a pro.

The results are back in and in no particular order safe to next week is – Frankie and Kevin and Caroline and Pasha.

The pair in the bottom two is Steve and Ola leaving Mark and Karen to go into the next week.

Barry Manilow

What a wonderful world

barry manilow

True professional Barry Manilow gave another flawless performance with such elegance, joined by Aljaz and Janette, with a video link of Louis Armstrong too.

Steve and Ola

Jive

Little Bitty Pretty One – Frankie Lymon and The Teenagers

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The pair slowed down the mood again and it was very limp again. Bit more enthusiasm this time around but not enough to save them for the show. Arms and legs reaching out were all off.

Sunetra and Brendan

Waltz

Last Request – Paolo Nutini

scd 14 sunetra 9

Sunetra gave another enthralling rendition of a silky smooth and graceful dance with levels of dance skill. Worthy of staying in the contest. Only needs a little cleaner on footwork in minor moments from Brendan’s flinging.

The Judges Vote

TX6 LIVE SHOW

It’s time for the decision.

Should there be a tie, leading judge Len will have the casting vote.

Craig – Sunetra and Brendan.

Darcey – On the ability, and the guns. Steve and Ola.

Bruno – Sunetra and Brendan.

Len – (Has casting vote) Cleanest and better couple, Sunetra and Brendan.

Backed Off!

steve ola couple

Both had something to say about their departure from the glitzy dancefloor.

Steve – It’s an incredible achievement.

Ola – Absolutely brilliant to teach and work with. You struggled a lot with your injuries.

Steve rambled on about the rest of the dancers.

Earlier in the series Steve complained to producers that Ola was bullying him two weeks ago and required a chaperone.

At least Steve can go back on The Wright Stuff and support Tory Fracking illegalities to rupture the Earth’s core, leading to natural disasters now.

Next week the final seven do an around the world theme.

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Strictly Come Dancing 2014, Week 9

Strictly Come Dancing 2014, Week 9

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Back from a brief absence is the loud cheering return of Claudia Winkleman and Tess Daly. As ever the judges Craig Revel-Horwood, Darcey Bussel, Len Goodman and Bruno Tonioli. Our score is in brackets to mark accordingly amid the mass over marking delusion from the outdated judges bias.

 

Steve and Ola

Jive

Little Bitty Pretty One – Frankie Lymon and The Teenagers

scd 14 steve 9

American football mad jawline lover Steve bursts through a paper like a teacloth to get on the floor. Boring, slow and empty steps. Ola joins to raise momentum by one pace. Awkward spin arounds in hold bobbing along. Pansy movements and limp choreography. Lame and boring.

The judges are talking so much tosh so forget their irrelevant comments for now.

4 7 6 6 (4)

 

Tess – “A four from Craig?!!” Tess, stop this trolloping. Everyone told you before, it doesn’t work dear.

 

Caroline and Pasha

American Smooth

Mack the Knife – Bobby Darin

scd 14 caroline 9

Good lift off stairs to floor setting mood. Good lone and together parts. Looking effortless. Sturdy and noticeable moment with footwork easily forgotten. Good centre platform use. Stunning lifts, elegant style. Smooth transitions. Mistake covered up as a pro.

7, 8, 9, 9 (9)

 

Pixie and Trent

Charleston

Diamonds are a girl’s best friend – Marilyn Monroe

scd 14 pixie 9

Good start but quite safe still. Arms little flimsy and cheap. Good push through on legs. Cartwheel done well but boring and slow. Good aeroplane hands. Not really a Charleston effect. Bit of jazzy theme but not much razzledazzle. Same as Simon now. Very safe and taking no risks. Could be out at this rate. Got to take a risk.

9, 9, 9, 10 (8)

 

 

Mark and Karen

Tango

Love Runs Out – One Republic

scd 14 mark 9

Karen opens her arms as Mark comes up behind and turns her around with one moment moves and no effect. Slow boring move backs with no sharpness. Kicks tepid and pifty. Standing still to music. Dips Karen an inch to get a step ticked off. On the spot dancing with no sharp effect. Horrible. Doesn’t even bother trying. Lame finish on the spot lowering hands down to Karen, who falls down in routine. All teeth and no substance. What a charming pair.

(Darcey and Bruno babble on with their over-sexual lust.)

8, 8, 8, 8 (6)

 

 

 

Frankie and Kevin

Viennese Waltz

What’s new Pussycat? – Tom Jones

scd 14 frankie 9

Frankie starts wafting skirt before being lifted off bench. Lots of arm waving about for no real effect . Too repetitive. Too long getting in spins around floor. Boring and tacky music. Kevin doing all work. Barely any skill on show. Good spin around but only real highlight. Ending meant nothing. Not much dancing at all.

9, 9, 10, 10 (8) (Attempts to save her from an otherwise obvious vote from the public to dance off.)

 

 

Jake and Janette

Samba

Los Del Rio – Macarena

scd 14 jake 9

Great swivel down slant start. Instant rhythm and groove. Smooth hips and strong sass. Great leg extensions and backside jiggles. Fun filled and technically sound. Great musicaility. Got real dance skill. Needs high votes. Best so far. Fantastic.

9, 10, 10, 9 (10) (Our first!)

 

 

Sunetra and Brendan

Waltz

Last Request – Paolo Nutini

scd 14 sunetra 9

Sunetra waits for Brendan to join her in embrace. Smooth and graceful turns instantly. Controlled shoulder tilts. Very good footing. Beautiful elements of grace. Too hard a fling from Brendan nearly took her footing off. Warm and magical. Best of Sunetra yet.

7, 7, 8, 8 (8)

 

Simon and Kristina

Salsa

Let’s hear it for the boy! – Deniece Williams

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Kristina loves her magazine as Simon awkwardly enters the floor back hopping in. Decent lift but all too rushed and clumsy routine in dance. Simon gets solo moment to dance. Too many spins, not enough partner connectivity to create meaning and very haphazard trying to throw everything in missing the whole point. As much as he tries he just hasn’t got it. Pretty boy has reached limit.

9, 9, 9, 9 (7)

 

 

Best dance of the night?

Jake and Janette

 

Danger zone

(in no particular order)

Steve, Sunetra and Frankie

 

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Strictly Come Dancing 2014, Week 8 Results: Blackpool

Strictly Come Dancing 2014, Week 8 Results: Blackpool

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After a great group dance, Tess and Zoe are back with the results.

Making it through to the next stage of the show, in no particular order is – Caroline and Pasha. Also joining are Pixie and Trent and Jake and Janette. The first to fall into the dance off are Sunetra and Brendan.

 

McBusted

Air Guitar

mcbusted

A mash up band from Busted and McFly perform their new single. Producers make sure Tess talks up drummer hunk Harry Judd, previous winner of the show. While he only won because he was a hunk and not full on skill, he was still decent on the show, then, mostly thanks to his dedication, not over-sexed partner.

 

Len’s Lens

More mishaps and advice were given in the protruding lens of Len. by the judges.

The results are back in and revealed. The rest through are, Simon and Kristina, Frankie and Kevin and Mark and Karen. Facing the dance off will be Judy and Anton, leaving Steve and Ola safe for next week.

 

 

Dame Shirley Bassey

Goldfinger

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Legend Dame Shirley performed a belter with one of her favourite Bond songs. Pure gold class with the Midas Touch.

 

Iain Waite popped up to remind Zoe to get back to the sister show It Takes Two. A hilarious laugh was provided this end when someone unnamed and old added “Is that ‘er fella?” Might as well be. Charming couple they are.

 

The dance off

Judy and Anton

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Did much better and this was best dance, but should not have been this long to go ahead. Too little too late.

Sunetra and Brendan

Samba

I Don’t Feel Like Dancin’ – Scissor Sisters

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Better second time around and more free flowing but still needs bigger and better choreography. Give her a chance to dance and show her capabilities.

 

Judges Vote

The judges vote who should stay and who should leave the show.

Craig – (Saves) Sunetra and Brendan

Darcey – Sunetra and Brendan.

Bruno – Both highly entertaining. Sunetra and Brendan.

Len – (Agreed)

 

Aced off!

judy anton

 

Judy finally served her final ace. Of her time on the show Judy said –

We got lucky. Anton put up with me for weeks. But better than what I was. Made my experience very, very special.

Anton also had a good word to say of his doubles partner.

So excited and thrilled of experience for Judy. The fun we’ve had because of Judy’s sense of humour. Great sport. Enormous fun for me.

 

Anton and Judy teased a Dirty Dancing lift moment as Anton slid up to Judy who then daringly jumped onto Anton in their last, fun filled dance.

 

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Strictly Come Dancing 2014, Week 8: Blackpool

Strictly Come Dancing 2014, Week 8: Blackpool

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This week’s dancing special comes from the ‘Las Vegas of the North’ Blackpool. Back are hosts Tess Daly and Zoe Ball, standing in while Claudia Winkleman spends time with her family since an incident over Halloween.

Scoring again are Craig Revel-Horwood, the over scoring extras Darcey Bussell, Len Goodman and Bruno Tonioli. Our scores is given in brackets with honest and real scoring advice among the lunacy of in-house favouritism/bias ruining the show.

After a magical start with Iveta and the rest of the dancers, the BBC centered a child singing fr the group performance. Allowing every little girls dream to be crushed proves insensitive given the BBC’s paedophilic sex scandal led by Sir Jimmy Savile. The BBC’s arrogance to be humble is ever disgraceful, despite the carefully constructed group number to seem genuine.

Iveta’s magical rising dress overlooking the floor was however a beautiful boost to start the show in Blackpool from the professionals.

Frankie and Kevin

Quickstep

A Town called Malice – The Jam

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To prepare Kevin proved genius and got Frankie down the arcade on the good old dance mat. 🙂

Kevin starts dancing with the wrong lady before choosing Frankie. A bit too long getting going but on floor worked well with bounce. Bit timid and still seeing Frankie hold back instead of really go for it. Seems more focused on smiling than stunning the floor. Needs to let it go to be serious contender. Good footwork but tad too empty in effect. Needs to connect further. Decent overall but not exceptional.

Len – Excited to watch that. That was fast. Light and bright as Blackpool illuminations. Your best dance.

Bruno – They flew across that dance floor. You did not put a foot wrong. You are the leader of the gang.

Craig – Used floor brilliantly. Did lose frame occasionally. Feet don’t always come together when they should. Bright. You are a fantastic dancer.

Darcey – Controlled and calm. Fun.

8, 9, 10, 10 (Oh here we go…) (8)

 

Jake and Janette

American Smooth

Feelin’ Good – Hal Mooney

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Instant sharpness from Jake as Janette is led by her beau from the dinner table. Strong posture in hold around the floor in tune with the music. Amazing lift of Janette throw to the air caught by Jake. Proof of leadership from Jake smashing the atmosphere. Commanding Janette constantly. Great style, skill, grace and smooth footwork. Will need votes to stay in though.

Bruno – Bad ass and sassy. Be careful in turns and lifts. Back in the game big time. (He never left it.)

Craig – Some artistry in your hand. Herculean performers of an American Smooth. Brilliaint. You know the value of stillness.

Darcey – Stylish, sophisticated. Very classy. Back on top.

Len – You put the oooh in moody. Such a twist on what I was expecting. Jake, you’re back. (He never left, you cast him down due to production values of saving favourites who can’t dance.)

9, 9, 9, 9 (9)

 

 

Sunetra and Brendan

Samba

I Don’t Feel Like Dancin’ – Scissor Sisters

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Sunetra enjoys a cocktail with the girls as Brendan shakes his groin and shimmys with the chicks. Sunetra eventually joins him. Over eager on turns. Good kicks and sass. Still little timid but good feeling attached. Tad watered down feeling though. Lots of errors. Should have more oomph less comedy shizz. Otherwise Sunetra may be out very soon. Needs a strong number.

Craig – Disconnected, loose, non specific. Felt you were struggling.

Darcey – Improvement. Vibrant, flamboyant. Plenty of energy in steps. Weakness in the footwork.

Len – Most energetic and most vibrant I’ve seen you in Latin dances. Go for it. Well done.

Bruno – I love the bouncing bunnies. Thank You for bringing the Playboy bunnies to Blackpool. Sexy.

Brendan – Shout out to all the production. (Ever a crawler, save my job please…)

6, 8, 8, 8 (7)

 

 

Simon and Kristina

Argentine Tango

El Tango de Roxanne – Moulin Rouge

scd 14 simon 8

Start sharp and controlled single moment. Joins Kristina. Bit lost in crossover feet. Concentrating on doing all footwork ticking box mentality than a dance which always ruins his performance. Too awkward and stiff in trying to ‘do it’ than dance it. Doesn’t seem to learn. Minor moments in middle easy and lacking impact. End lift okay but all for show not technical. Good guy but doesn’t seem to be able to adapt to change.

Darcey – Wow! Worried you’d make it a showdance. Got better and better. Accuracy between leg action. I can’t shut up.

Len – Winner winner! Chicken dinner!

Bruno – Dark Lord. So masterful. Game of action. So predictable. Climax at the end spectacular.

Craig – In two minds. Little bit stiff in places. Need to be freer and looser. It’s just advice darling. I did love it.

8, 10, 10, 10 (Oh get real!) (8)

 

 

Judy and Anton

Viennese Waltz

Let’s Go Fly a Kite – Mary Poppins

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Both fly a kite into the floor. Ironically it leads them. Anton dances with an ice-cream as Judy wanders off. Back together the pair stand on the spot and do side to side arm sways. Stand and plank point arms for Judy now. Better just walking it instead. No effort, no attempt, all a joke. Judy then gets flown to the sky by balloons. Please let poetic justice prevail. Not a Viennese Waltz at all.

Len – Bit sticky in places. That is your best so far.

Bruno – It was actually recognisable as a Viennese Waltz. You did a dance!

Craig – All went horribly wrong. Posture appealing. In and out of lifts, you had a good fifteen seconds. Definitely your personal best.

Darcey – Softer lady. Anton got you turning. Still have to keep working on that top line.

4, 6, 7, 7 (2)

 

 

Mark and Karen

Charleston

We Speak No Americano – Yolanda Be Cool

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Mark says its “back to being cheeky Mark” Or dumbass bellend who doesn’t care, in translation. The pair are made for each other, all teeth and no substance Karen turned Mark into a magician. Mark claps his hands and turns the magic box holding Karen around, Standing on the spot dancing Mark does some paltry hand movements. Lame lift over back of Karen. Horrible arm crouch shoulder sways. Karen rolls herself into a floor grab flashing her knickers. She dips down on Mark’s chest to pout as he stands and holds. Mark walks along with head on Karen’s ass. Sad, empty and lonesome. All teeth and no substance, literally.

 

Bruno – Can’t believe how fr you’v come. Swift on your feet, comical. Fantastic. (Just ask him for a shag and get lost.)

Craig – I’m starting to fall in love, actually. Mark desperately kisses Craig for the gay vote. Love it, love it, love it. (Pathetic.)

Darcey – Light, sweet action. I love it.

Len – I’ll sum it up, everything these have said with knobs on. (Cock-a-hoop, then?)

9, 9, 9, 9 (7)

 

 

 

Pixie and Trent

Paso Doble

The Eve of War – Jeff Wayne

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Down from the sky comes Trent as Pixie lures him toward with cape wafting. Joined by two hunky Gladiators Trent takes hold of Pixie. Strong arm extensions and fierce attitude form Pixie. Good spins but missing extra whoosh. Good leg out arch around. Very good atmosphere and style. Could lose the nicey-nicey attitude in order to boost higher, but still smooth and strong.

Craig – Indomitable force in this competition. Full of skill, almost invincible on tht floor. Quite extraordinary.

Darcey – Some animal in you. Watch legs.

Len – That was, Trent great job in choreography. Loved it.

Bruno – PIXIE! The dominatrix! She had three to fight over, very greedy can I borrow one? (In reference to the male dancers.) Perfection. (Lunatic sex pest.)

9, 9, 10, 10 (9)

 

 

Steve and Ola

American Smooth

Rolling in the Deep – Adele

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Steve stands in center waiting for Ola to charge in. Lift early on with no feeling. Air capes fill the floor detracting from dance. Steve walks along with arm horizontal and tepid. Awkward and awful move around floor with Ola. Lift spins around. Spins on floor. Flips Ola onto shoulders for finish. Empty and sad. Nothing dance.

Darcey – Really kept your cool. Well done.

Len – Showed your gentler side. Lifts right in character with flow of dance. Like a small man at the urinal, got to get up on your toes. (Disgusting pervsions from old man on BBC, no change then.)

Bruno – So much impotence. Control strength and energy. Well done.

Craig – Len’s analogy little to be desired. Cool, calm, collected. Obviously in touch with your feminine side. Lacked little flair. Beautiful routine.

7, 8, 8, 8 (6)

 

 

 

 

Caroline and Pasha

Jive

Crocodile Rock – Elton John

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Caroline dances in Union Jack dress in front of immovable guard Pasha. Pasha breaks code and dances with groovy Caz. Great kicks and flicks. Good arm extensions. Bit of character. Bit slow for a Jive. No-one can beat Jill Halfpenny and Darren Bennett. Caroline nicks Pasha furry muff hat. Okay but not amazing.

Len – Jive’s about kicks and flicks. Class, fast and built to last.

Bruno – Yes! Caroline flies the flag for Strictly! Rule Britannia, thank you Blackpool. (Shut up you loon.)

Craig – Absolute fire.

Darcey – Fast springy girl is back. Perfect for a Jive.

9, 9, 9, 10 (There’s always one.) (9)

 

 

Best dance of the night?

Pixie and Trent

 

Danger zone

(in no particular order)

Jake, Sunetra and Judy

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Strictly Come Dancing 2014, Week 7

Strictly Come Dancing 2014, Week 7

TX6 LIVE SHOW

Tonight the seventh week begins after the outrageous Halloween special unveiling even more of the BBC’s past demons and constant corruption from within. It was a good thing to have servicemen honoured and in the studio, but BBC think people won’t see how full of it they are to use them for good publicity. Shame on you. Have a bit of class for the troops at least. All about trying to retain BBC favour not the honour of the service. No tact.

As ever the useless judging panel is back with the only credible judge Craig Revel-Horwood, Darcey Bussell, Len Goodman and Bruno Tonioli. Our honest and true score is in brackets among the over-marking hypocrisy on show t offer such clarity among the Strictly circus.

 

Simon and Kristina

Quickstep

I Got Rhythm – Bobby Darin

scd 14 simon 7

Simon jumps from the steps to the floor. Counts as one lift. Long time getting into hold after theatrics which added little to routine. Good spin through on spot turns. Smiley on spot dancing again becoming all box ticking to get through a dance and not really being free and going for it. Same position of progress again. Stuck to the same thing and did not really develop. All box ticking. Got to loose stiff, brainless attitude to being more freeloading.

Len – The Quicktep isn’t simple Simon. The boy from blue. Go the gold mile at Blackpool.

Bruno – Gave us plenty of glamour. You’re enjoying yourself. Having a good time on the dancefloor.

Craig – Posture could have been improved slightly. Have improved. Flew around that floor. Fast becoming a serious contender. (Who paid you to say that?)

Darcey – Terrific entrance.

7, 9, 9, 8 (7)

 

Caroline and Pasha

Waltz

Three Times A Lady – Lionel Ritchie

scd 14 caroline 7

Staring in a behind position looked more like a Rumba than a Waltz. Finally in-hold goo gliding along. Too slow, lacking something extra. Good tilt spins around. Bit wobbly but graceful moments. Trying hard. Bit wishy-washy though and lacking depth of a traditional Waltz. Was much more of a Rumba than anything.

Bruno – You put me in the mood. Total honesty about your commitment to what you do. Shoulders. Sometiime trembling.

Craig – Little bit blocky, your top line. Loved emotion.

Darcey – Smooth lady. Very romantic quality. Open shoulders, relax them.

Len – Little bit of tension. Dance requires so much control. Has got to show rise and fall. That was lacking little bit. Well done.

7, 8, 8, 8 (7)

 

 

Jake and Janette

Rumba

Strangers in the Night – Frank Sinatra

scd 14 jake 7

Navy officer Jake smoothly manoeuvers Janette into hold perfectly. Good swivel hips in a timid and charismatic way. Not over done. Beautiful back lg dip from Janette. Good follow up dip down. Excellent glide along with Janette’s leg on shoulder. Very loving and smooth. Calm and sensual.

Craig – Hand shaping wasn’t particularly, very wooden. Dance little too safe and too subtle. Slightly disappointed.

Darcey – Very hard to achieve such sensuality all way through. I think you achieved that. Supported her very well.

Len – Little bit all at sea on hands. Hard dance for men. Acceptable wasn’t exceptional.

Bruno – Continuous motion, never stops. At times felt little bit jagged. Hard to strike a balance, especially for men. Brave attempt.

(Will Pixie, Frankie and Mark be marked highly? Judges always have their favourites or are they the producers? )

6, 7, 7, 7 (8) (What were they watching?)

Judy and Anton

Paso Doble

I Fought the Law – The Clash

scd 14 judy

Here we are! Andy Murray is finally on a Strictly VT. BBC’s taxpayers payoff to book Judy on the show is now validated.

Judy Judy finds Anton “Guilty” off illegal lifting. Well at least someone listened. Judy stands in front of released Anton to remove cape and doesn’t move. Anton literally drags, moves and lifts her all around. Literally no effort or dancing at all. Absolutely disgraceful. Walks around slow with Anton couple paces before locking him back up. Horrendous. The epitome of rigormortis.

Darcey – Doesn’t carry though to moves. Every move has to be so exaggerated. Very good effort.

Len – Centre court to criminal court. Hope you come back for Blackpool cos I wanna see Craig’s face.

Bruno – Literally insane. Great achievement.

Craig – All very pedestrian. Walk all way through. (Anton argues.) At least a little bit of dancing. I’ve given up.

Zoe told to ask about and wish Andy Murray good luck. (Yawn.)

3, 5, 5, 5 (0)

 

Tess is eating a cone of chips in the audience. (?)

 

Sunetra and Brendan

Foxtrot

All of Me – John Legend

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Good start to the floor of Sunetra. Graceful. Smooth in-hold around. Tidy footwork. Bit slowed down afterward than usual. Good turnaround and grace in dance routine. Smooth and elegant.

Len – Couple of little incidents.

Sunetra – Yeah, that not happened before.

Len – As Henry VIII would say, take them to the tower. Blackpool tower!

Bruno – If you go wrong keep going and hardly anybody will notice. Don’t stumble and drop it.

Craig – Real shame. Had potential to really floor everybody. Became clunky. Lot of gaping. Beautiful routine. Well it would have been.

Darcey – One of best top lines. Little bit ploddy.

Brendan – you hit wrong foot. Only one bit went wrong. She did a great job. (Learn when to shut up ruining it for yourself Brendan. It’s not about you.)

7, 8, 8, 8 (8)

 

 

Alison and Aljaz

Charleston

Friend Like Me – Robin Williams OST from Aladdin

scd 14 alison 7

Working feet very well. Great partnership with Aljaz with symmetrical routine. Strong character, jhuzz and attempt at turn lifting Aljaz. Great Jazz feel. Strong style, fun and enthusiastic work to end. Amazing. Alison even got to snog Aljaz.

Bruno – So vivacious. Affinity for slapstick. Kinda lost a little bit. Was charging like a locomotive.

Craig – Did enjoy routine. Very stylish, chic. Love your jazz hands don’t you? Wasn’t brilliant routine technically, but most enjoyable.

Darcey – So suits you. Improvement in your strength. Joy to watch.

Len – Right up your alley Alj. (Ally)

6, 7, 7, 7 (7)

 

 

Mark and Karen

Waltz

Weekend In New England – Barry Manilow

scd 14 mark 7

Trying to be more manly, bellend Mark tried to get the bloke vote by playing football to show his leg skills.

The pair walk to each other and hold each other while smiling. Karen extends hands downward as Mark just stands there with arms around. Stands still and smiles outward. Tiny spin around and two steps along too wooden. Bad footwork. Lifts Karen around off the floor. Empty, lacking and pathetic.

Craig – Certainly amorous. Really enjoyed it.

Darcey – Becoming very expressive performer. Led Karen round the dancefloor. I was very impressed.

Len – Swing and sway was lacking a bit. Footwork was terrific. That was lovely.

Bruno – Tender, loving, so involving. You’re a keeper. Bit more swing in there, we can work on it. (Looks at Mark suggestively.)

7, 8, 8, 8 (6)

 

 

Frankie and Kevin

Samba

La Bamba – Connie Francis

scd 14 frankie 7

Start bit naff. Good into hold swift and fun thrilling but too timid to drive full party atmosphere. Good flamenco footworking moments. Holding back a little. Not fully going for it. Too many inhibitions holding back. Bit of skirt wafting. Too pleasant, sweet and scared to do something risky. Fair but not thrilling. Or should that be frills. One of you hey Tess.

Darcey – Really pushed Frankie. Couple places, little hiccups. Like more of a sexier Smaba.

Len – Very fast routine, one or two incidents. Great song, routine and dancing.

Bruno – Couldn’t keep u with it. (Starts talking weird language. Need subtitles for the SAP?)

Craig – Worst dance yet.

Tess – What were you seeing?

Craig – That. (Finally someone telling a remote level of truth. Horray! Or is that Ole? Another one for you Tess.)

7, 8, 9, 8 (7)

 

Pixie and Trent

Foxtrot

When I’m Sixty Four – The Beatles

scd 14 pixie 7

Washer woman Pixie does some Victorian mangling with Trent. Very slow and awkward clap along style. Very drab and boring, All a spout of steps and nothing else. Bad routine could land her in bottom two. Good single leg turnaround. Decent work with steps but empty and bored.

Len – I love a mangle. Lovely, charming dance. Dance was charming.

Bruno – Housewife superstar. Original. Lot of character.

Craig – Gor-g-h-ous.

Darcey – You stretched yourself open. Well done. Fabulous.

9, 10, 8, 9 (7) (Seriously? That was not too grand, lets be honest.)

 

 

Steve and Ola

Paso Doble

Use Somebody – Kings of Leon

scd 14 steve 7

Wafting his cape uselessly Steve cuddles Ola on her knees from behind. Lifts leg off ground and over Ola. Walk around in-hold arm moves limp. Jumps up and around on spot moving two feet adding nothing. intimidation very lacking and laughable. Spin around on floor of Ola only big moment. As pale as Ola’s green dress. Dip down to floor was empty. Only a few steps tapped.

Bruno – (Jumps up and screams.) Needs more refinement.

Craig – Vicious brute. Still in shock, quite frankly.

Darcey – In the upper body… (loses words and gushes.) So powerful, very masculine. Thought it was brilli-ANT!

Len – Frightened life out of me. Well done.

6, 8, 7, 7 (5)

 

 

Best dance of the night

 Jake and Janette

 

Danger zone

(in no particular order )

Steve, Alison and Judy

 

IMAGES

BBC